Let Sleeping Lions Lie

Lion and I are trying to figure out our shit, for lack of a better word. He needs X and I need Z. How do we get to Y? Adulting is hard. We’ll work it out. One of Lion’s issues is that he says he can’t roll over on his left side to face me. I told him there have been many nights I’ve rolled over and been face to face with him. It happened again last night. It made me smile. I guess he can’t feel the pain in his sleep.

[Lion — Sometimes my shoulders hurt. Last night it was more comfortable on my left side. I don’t understand the sexual/romantic value of lying on my side.] [Mrs. Lion — I thought we could kiss more easily.]

I think I just have to find a way to deal with the stress of doing most things around the house myself and trying to get the psycho dog to behave herself. Even if I don’t have a sinus headache or pain, I’m still dealing with stress. It’s not so much that I have to do the things. It’s how I deal with them. I allow myself to get frustrated. It is what it is. Just do it. What other inane sayings can I come up with?

A long time ago, I used to say I needed to punch a tree. I haven’t actually felt that way in a while, but I think it’s still fitting. I need an outlet. And, no, it won’t be Lion’s butt. I’m not going to wale away on his buns when I’m very upset. First of all, if I’m not frustrated with him, it’s not fair to whomp him. Second, even if I am frustrated with him, I’m not going to allow myself to get out of control whomping him. For years I’ve said I need a punching bag. Again, not Lion. A batting cage in the backyard would allow me to smack baseballs and maybe give the dog something to do with her energy so she’s not jumping on us. Win-win. I’ll have to figure out some cheaper alternatives.

I’m coming at this from my side of things because, despite women’s best efforts, you can’t change men. I’m not saying Lion can’t change himself. Maybe there are things he can do to make things better. As much as he thinks I’m in control, ultimately he’s one of the things I can’t control.

Okay. The huddle is over. Everyone knows the play. Break.