Mrs. Lion has decided to take my suggestion and spank me if I don’t perform sexually as she wishes. The idea isn’t to train me to ejaculate on command. That’s more BDSM stuff. She will spank me if she can’t bring me to the edge of orgasm or make me ejaculate when she wants. That doesn’t mean I’m working against a timer or anything like that. It is much simpler. If she runs out of steam and I don’t achieve what she wants, I get spanked. Julie from strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com wrote a great comment about this process:
“I think she should paddle you when you fail to ejaculate, and she would prefer you do. Likewise, if you ejaculate during edging and she did not intend you to. It’s not about penalizing you or punishing you in either case, it’s just a fact of life.”
This is a profound change in the way we look at spanking. Originally, it was a part of play. I get turned on by the idea of being spanked. Mrs. Lion would spank me as part of a scene when we adopted an FLR where Mrs. Lion made and enforced rules. Spanking evolved into a true punishment. It’s been very effective in helping me learn what Mrs. Lion wishes. Julie is suggesting that spanking is also a routine way of reminding me of my role.
If I can’t reach the edge, for example, I’m not naughty. It’s simply that I’m supposed to do it. Failing results in a spanking. It’s that simple. If I can’t get to the edge, I’m spanked. If I ejaculate when I shouldn’t, I get spanked. It isn’t that I was naughty. It’s just what happens. Julie has been very successful training her husband David with this technique. I suppose it seems harsh to some, but for Julie and us, it isn’t unreasonable. [Mrs. Lion — I’m not convinced it isn’t unreasonable. I’m just agreeing to try it.]
Julie also uses spanking as a way of reminding David who is in charge:
“For example, sometimes I organize (enthusiastically) for other women to perform sexual acts on my husband. Afterward, I always give him the most severe spankings to “remind him to whom he belongs”. It’s not punitive. I set it up. I encouraged it. His subsequent spanking is just a fact of life.”
In this example, David didn’t fail to meet an expectation. It’s just a way to help him focus on Julie as the woman who holds the power. I’m very impressed with this idea. I know Mrs. Lion isn’t planning to expose me to other women, but there are times when I might forget my place. A spanking would certainly remind me of who is in charge. This is a much more logical concept than our “just because” spankings. Instead, it’s a fact of life, a reminder for me. It doesn’t require a warning or explanation. It’s just like edging, a fact of life.
My interpretation of this concept is that instead of using words to remind me, Mrs. Lion uses the paddle. It makes a lot of sense. I can’t argue with a spanking. I’m smart enough to know that complaining will just make it worse. I have to shut up and accept the ten-minute fact of life. I realize that this concept is very different. Mrs. Lion isn’t sure about it but agrees it’s worth trying.
The hardest part is realizing it isn’t punitive. I’m not being punished. It’s no different than our teasing sessions. I get edged almost every day with no hope of release. It’s a fact of life. We’ve been doing this for over eight years. A new fact of life is a spanking if I can’t reach the edge or ejaculate when Mrs. Lion didn’t intend it. Another fact of life is that I get spanked if Mrs. Lion thinks I need reminding of who is in charge. It isn’t punishment. It’s just a fact of life.