I got up about 6:30 this morning. I had to pee, and I figured the dog did too. A tiny puppy bladder can only hold it for so long. I scooped her up and took her out so there’d be no chance of an accident. She loves being outside. She spent her days running around outside with her brothers and sister, so the grass is a home away from home. She’s very fond of my shoes. I think it’s because I was wearing them when we picked her up, and they probably still smell like her mom and siblings.

Tomorrow is punishment day. I’ll drag out the spanking bench and give Lion his “just because” swats. Actually, he deserves more. When I’m driving, he likes to tell me what to do. Not always. It’s usually limited to someone doing something stupid in front of me that Lion thinks deserves a blast of the horn. It happened on the way home the other night. We were on a detour, and the person in front of us was trying to get around a semi that had just pulled off the side of the road. There was a car coming at us in the other lane. To be safe, the person in front of us waited. I knew what he was doing. Lion wanted me to blow the horn. Given how slow the person turned the light, I assumed he didn’t know where he was going because of the detour. It was near where we used to live, so we could do it blindfolded. But clearly, he wasn’t sure. It’s not a bad idea to be cautious on an unfamiliar road, in the dark, with headlights in your eyes. Beeping wouldn’t have made him any more likely to move. I won’t say I was happily waiting, and I may very well have yelled at the guy, but I knew what he was doing, and I was fine with it. The last idiot we were behind who couldn’t even get anywhere near the speed limit was the one that pissed me off.

I did growl at Lion. If he didn’t know it was a growl then he’s just not paying attention. Usually when he has suggestions while I’m driving I ask him who’s driving. I considered yelling, “Strike one!” but I didn’t. I don’t think it’s worth an extra five minutes added to the timer, but it might be worth a few extra hard swats. I’ll have to remember to ask him who was driving as I deliver those heftier swats.

Listen to this post.