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In: Lion's Journal, Male Chastity, Sex, Spanking

I wrote our first post in February 2014. It marked our first serious attempt at male chastity. Before then, we had done some BDSM play. Mrs. Lion tied me to the bed or restrained me in our sling. Sometimes, as part of our play, she spanked me. A bruise was exceptionally rare. She put clothespins and IcyHot on my balls. She also plugged my butt and inserted dildos on occasion. We had a normal, slightly kinky marriage.

When we started this blog, we were married twelve years. Intercourse had become rare. Any sex was rare. Mrs. Lion was angry that I didn’t romantically initiate it. My irrational fear of rejection paralyzed me. As bad as our sex life was, our relationship remained very strong. Then, as now, we were completely devoted to one another.

A few weeks before Post One, Mrs. Lion locked me into a Chinese male chastity device. We both assumed that I would grow tired of wearing it after a short time. As you know, I didn’t. The fit wasn’t great, and after a few weeks, I had sores under the base ring. Mrs. Lion removed it. When I healed, it went back on.

From that fateful day in December 2013, I never had an orgasm that Mrs. Lion didn’t produce. On that first night, when she agreed to lock me into a chastity device, she learned that I had been masturbating the entire time we were together. I assumed she knew. To my surprise, she had no idea I did it. When I told her, she made her first rule for me. I was never to masturbate again. Then, she told me to do it while she watched. It would be my last time. She wanted to learn how to replace my hand with hers.

you will not jerk off again!

At the time, I didn’t take this rule too seriously. Since I was locked in a male chastity device, I didn’t have an opportunity to do it anyway. When she unlocked me because of the sores, I wasn’t tempted. Mrs. Lion was teasing me and jerking me off much more frequently than I did it myself.

Over the first few months, we tried several inexpensive chastity devices. All of them made me sore. I ordered my first custom cage, a Jail Bird. It fit well and didn’t hurt me. From that time on, I was only unlocked for teasing or being jerked off by Mrs. Lion. For three years, I was in a male chastity device 24/7.

It came off when I needed shoulder surgery. It stayed off for several months while I recuperated. I wasn’t tempted to masturbate. After I recovered, I was locked up again. There were periods that Mrs. Lion let me be wild. These periods increased in length. Mrs. Lion had broken me. I didn’t attempt to get myself off. The male chastity device did its job. I’m trained not to get myself off. Now, at Post 5,000, I still haven’t masturbated. The only sex I get is delivered by Mrs. Lion when she decides to provide it. If she doesn’t want to tease me, then I go without. I don’t even think of filling in with my own hand.

That’s a huge change for me. A lot of women don’t understand this. They don’t consider masturbation particularly hard to resist. Boys and men jerk off from puberty to grave. I’m a rare exception. I’m even more exotic since I didn’t decide to stop. Mrs. Lion told me to stop, and I obeyed.

please be my disciplinary wife

At Post 1, I asked Mrs. Lion to make rules and spank me if I broke them. She didn’t enforce any for a long time. We agreed that controlling my orgasms was a great start. After a while, I asked again for rules. Mrs. Lion set three: I was not to spill food on my shirt, I had to wait for her to start eating before I begin, and I had to set up our coffee pot for breakfast every morning. Her idea was that I would frequently break these rules, and we would get experience establishing our disciplinary relationship.

It wasn’t as easy as we thought. Mrs. Lion didn’t notice many of my slips. She had to learn to observe my behavior consistently. We both agreed that consistency was essential if we were serious about a disciplinary marriage. It took time for her to learn to catch me every time I broke one of those simple rules. When I did, she frequently forgot to punish me. Life intruded, and days slipped by.

We decided to set punishment days. Mrs. Lion would be sure to set aside time to spank me on those days. She decided that Monday and Thursday would be punishment days. I had to remind her. If I forgot, she would punish me. This worked. Mrs. Lion got better at observing my infractions. She spanked me on punishment days when I earned them. I got quite a few spankings for forgetting to remind her.

I didn’t consciously try not to spill food. I made a small effort to wait before eating. When it came to the coffee pot, well, you know about that. To both of our surprise, after a month or so of consistent punishment for infractions, I rarely got food on my shirt. I rarely ate before Mrs. Lion. As for the coffee pot, well, you know. Most of my spankings were for not reminding Mrs. Lion of punishment days. She decided to add a third. Now Monday, Thursday, and Saturday are punishment days. She added it so that I had another opportunity to forget and earn a punishment.

Mrs. Lion considers catching me breaking the rules as a game. She loves games. She’s gotten very good at the Lion obedience game. I’ve improved too. At Post 5,000, domestic discipline is a permanent part of our marriage. We still have areas to improve. Mrs. Lion has made some newer rules. I am not allowed to interrupt her or act like a know-it-all. At Post 5,000, she rarely lets me know that I break them and seldom punishes me when I do. We both agree that needs to improve.

spare the paddle, spoil the lion

A few dates after we first met, I mentioned that I like to be spanked. Mrs. Lion agreed to try. Her first effort was with her hand. She hit me so softly that I could barely feel it. Over time, she learned to use more force and tried various paddles on me. By Post 1, she could make me yelp a little. I rarely bruised or felt the results more than a few minutes after she finished.

I encouraged her to make it hurt more. I wanted to dread a spanking. After all, it was punishment. Mrs. Lion tried. At one point, we decided that a punishment spanking should be horrible from the first swat. So, she hit very hard right from the start. I was trying to escape by the fourth or fifth swat. That wasn’t the answer. Around this time, Julie of strictjuliespanks and I were becoming friends.

She wrote about how she spanks her husband. Julie starts with more gentle warmup swats and works up to punishment-level spanking. That way, her husband doesn’t try to escape. She made the point that the spanking will still be very unpleasant once she completed the warmup. Mrs. Lion tried this, and it worked.

Mrs. Lion’s spankings were improving but were more at the level of play spankings I’ve received over the years. Mrs. Lion continued to hit harder and longer. I never avoided bruises. However, it was rare when I felt my spanking the next day. We discussed this, and Mrs. Lion decided to increase the time of a spanking. Before timing them, Mrs. Lion beat me until she decided I had enough. It turned out that a spanking rarely went five minutes.

Then I read an account of a Disciplinary Wives Club Spanking. Aunt Kay, who founded the DWC, taught that a spanking should last a minimum of ten minutes. If the offense was serious or a repeat, she should add five minutes for each additional enhancement. She advocated that the wife should use a timer to assure she gave full measure to her husband. When the timer sounded, it didn’t mean she finished the spanking. It just reminded the disciplinary wife when she had reached the minimum time.

Mrs. Lion embraced this concept. Now, at Post 5,000, I feel the results of one of her spankings for a minimum of two days after she’s administered it. While it hasn’t happened yet, I’ve been told that she will not hesitate to repeat the spanking the next day if needed. Be careful what you wish for! I dread Mrs. Lion’s spankings. If you look back at our recent posts, you can see pictorial evidence of my blistered bottom.

a surprising journey

Looking ahead from Post 5,000, it’s clear to me that we are on the right track. I can’t explain it, but we have both become happier as we have increased Mrs. Lion’s authority. It isn’t that I have destructive habits. I don’t. Our domestic discipline is more complex and subtle. In one sense, it’s a sort of spanking game. Mrs. Lion improves her observational skills. When she does, she can catch me breaking a rule. When I’m caught, I’m punished.

On the surface, this looks like a tyrannical femdom marriage. The poor lion is beaten for the smallest offenses. Yes, I am. I want it that way. Less obvious is the fact that 95 percent of our relationship is traditional and cooperative. We do things for each other because of our love and respect. I have a traditionally male role. I make most of the decisions. Mrs. Lion likes that. However, at any time, she can decide she doesn’t like what I’m doing, and her paddle comes out. I think it should come out more often. I can see the frustration and upset in her eyes when I am thoughtless or interrupt her. What I don’t see is the game-playing lioness who will make me regret what I did. This is an area for growth.

Sitting here at Post 5,000, I can say that our marriage is stronger. Our bond is not going to break. I love Mrs. Lion with all my heart. I can’t believe how lucky I am that she chose to love me.

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In: Sex

I didn’t do any of the chores last night. I picked up our grocery order and put it all away. I made dinner and fought with the dog to take her pills. Then I cleaned up from dinner and took a shower. Nope. I didn’t do anything.

A little while after I came out of the shower, I tied Lion’s balls up. As I was playing with him, he said I should always get him hard before I tie him up. I don’t remember this always being the case. Sometimes the act of tying his balls is what made him hard. I understand things have changed over time. Ironically, when I untied him and asked him to move across the bed to be sucked, my weenie was on his way to getting hard.

I took my time sucking him. I let my tongue wander all over my weenie. I wrapped my fingers around him and tugged on his balls. He got fairly hard, and I thought we might be on our way to the edge, but he stalled out. Even though I continued to suck, he started to lose it. Obviously, it still felt good. He was purring. I don’t mind his getting softer, as long as it feels good and I can still suck him. However, at a certain point, I have to give up. I can’t do it all night. That’s what the next night is for.

Tonight I have to do one of the chores, at least one. I have to take the freezer apart to chip away at ice buildup. The stupid design of our self-defrosting freezer puts the drain at the bottom (which makes perfect sense in a gravitational sense) but eventually, the water freezes and builds up. Then it stops working so well, and I have to take it apart. We have a service contract, but it just seems like more trouble than it’s worth to call someone in. We’ll save that service contract for when I can’t do it, or something else happens.

Assuming I’m not too achy from crawling around on the floor with the freezer, I will try again with Lion. Maybe I’ll shove in a butt plug in while I mess with the freezer. Then he can percolate while I’m busy elsewhere. It might just make him hard more easily. I know it will make him remember me even though I’m not sitting right beside him. It’s worth a shot.

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In: Spanking

Things are piling up here. This puts a lot of pressure on Mrs. Lion. It also makes me feel very guilty. I should be doing a lot more. I know that I can’t, but that doesn’t stop me from feeling horrible about putting the extra burden on Mrs. Lion. I’m pretty sure that my libido isn’t being helped by this guilt. I am doing my best to avoid making any demands on her. I only ask for things we need for the house or my health. I’m working hard on the concept that I shouldn’t want things for myself.

The other night, I mentioned that one of the people I know on Twitter is non-binary. I asked her to explain what that meant to them. They explained that there was no strong identity as either a man or woman. This person is female and a top. I was surprised at their self-identification since I know they (she?) has sex with men and plays with them. I can’t wrap my head around this concept.

I said that Mrs. Lion was binary in more ways than gender. She asked me what I meant. I explained that she had become a binary punisher. She has learned to deliver a minimum level of pain anytime I require correction. A “just because” spanking is more than ten minutes of very painful spanking. That is the minimum. When the punishment taxi meter drops, that’s the base charge. It can only go up from there.

I’m not complaining. It’s the best approach to punishment. As we learned in the past, if the perceived seriousness of an offense tempers the severity, I will almost always get away without even yelping. When the minimum is a butt-blistering spanking, I have to take any misstep seriously. I don’t like my butt blistered. Ten minutes feels like hours when my bottom is being paddled.

Binary punishment is necessary for me. Like most guys, I’ve been known to make a cost-benefit analysis of something I want. For example, if I’m watching TV and I’ve forgotten to set up the coffee pot, I might consider the cost of a light spanking is worth it if I can stay in bed and watch TV. If I know that I will get at least ten minutes of hard paddling, the cost/benefit equation tips all the way in favor of getting that pot ready. Binary punishment keeps me obedient. I never have to wonder what will happen if I piss off my lioness. I know!

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In: Sex, Spanking

Twice yesterday, I went out to mow the lawn. It was hot. The grass was dry, so it was easier to cut, but I still haven’t made it all the way through. At least the dog’s area is short. Now she doesn’t have to wade through high grass to do her thing.

I put the spanking bench together. I think Lion said the strap to make sure he stays in place will be here today. The bench is big, so I put it in the pantry for now. I’ll have to drag it out when I want to beat his butt. Lion says it’s out of sight, out of mind. Don’t count on it. I’ll be tripping over it in the pantry. I’ll remember it’s there.

I’ve done a lot of walking in the past few days. I’m not used to that much exercise. I was a little achy last night. And stiff. I probably could have played with Lion, but I just needed a break. I haven’t done the laundry. I have to take the freezer apart to get rid of ice buildup. I have to change the bed. There are lots to do, and everything seems to be needed at once.

I won’t promise Lion, but I plan to tie his balls up and watch them bounce as I jerk him off. I like making them bounce. And then I’ll have him move across the bed to suck him. He hasn’t been waiting long for an orgasm, but I might need to give him one. We’ll have to see if he really wants one. How horny is he? I hope to find out later. [Lion — It depends on your point of view. Today it’s been 10 days since my last orgasm.]

Despite all the chores left to do, it’s nice to be home. Unfortunately, I’m at work, and it feels like it will be a long day. But I get to go home to Lion, and that’s the best part of the day.