In her post yesterday, Mrs. Lion discussed a subject that has confused me for years. She pointed out that I get sexual about being spanked. It is a turn-on to think about a spanking. She said,
“I wondered if punishing him is more for him than me. He keeps saying I should assert my power. Am I really, though? I mean, he likes (the idea of) spanking. I’m not saying he deliberately does things to get punished. I’m just wondering if I’m not rewarding him for being bad…He likes being spanked even if he knows (or maybe because he knows) he won’t be able to sit for a day or two.”
I can understand why she might feel this way. Based on my reading, men who are in disciplinary relationships are sexually attracted to being spanked. I certainly am. Mrs. Lion posited that maybe she should do things I truly hate, like ignoring me or withholding sex. Well, I don’t get enough sex to provide her with many incentives. Instead of waiting for ten days, will I have to wait for twenty? That could be effective but severely limits opportunities to punish me. I’m not saying she shouldn’t do this, but it has obvious limitations.
I wonder if other wives also feel that spanking a naughty husband is more of a reward than a punishment. I think that it can be. That’s why a punishment spanking has to be painful and unpleasant. The reason I asked Mrs. Lion to punish me as needed came from sexual curiosity. The inherent attraction to spanking makes me docilely present my butt for punishment.
We both know that sexual interest helps suppress any defiance I might feel. After all, I want to be spanked since the idea really turns me on. So far, it sounds like Mrs. Lion is right. If Mrs. Lion spanked me for a short time or didn’t try to hurt me, it could be a sexual experience. However, she doesn’t do that. After she warms me up, she makes sure that she is hurting me. I hate it. Yet, the stupid lion that I am, a day later, the memory is a sort of a turn-on.
The question is whether the spanking causes me to change my behavior? To my surprise, it does. One of my first rules was that I have to wait for Mrs. Lion to start eating or give me permission before I begin. In the beginning, I got at least one or two spankings a week when I forgot. I seldom eat first. I think I have been punished once for this in the last three years. Spanking works. It isn’t a permanent solution. Another rule is that I have to set up the coffee pot, ready for Mrs. Lion in the morning. I still forget to do that. When I do, I get punished. The spanking serves as a strong reminder to remember. I need that reminder on a fairly regular basis.
The point is that even though I am sexually attracted to spanking, it still works as an effective punishment. In a sense, a punishment spanking is too much of a good thing. When we first started using spanking to punish me, I suggested that Mrs. Lion could get a guide on how severely to spank me based on how well I changed my behavior. At the time, Mrs. Lion didn’t take that advice. More recently, she’s been very willing to make my spankings more severe. At this point, she follows the DWC guide and spanks me for ten minutes if I break one rule. If there are additional offenses, she adds five more minutes for each one.
Even though I know that a spanking will leave me with a bruised, painful bottom, I still have that sexual connection. The connection is not strong enough to make me actively seek out punishment. However, if I go more than a couple of weeks without a spanking, my interest in sex seems to fall off a bit. Mrs. Lion changes too. If she doesn’t spank me regularly, she seems to forget to notice any rules I might break.
I’m sure that if Mrs. Lion starts punishing me for interrupting her, she will develop the disciplinary habit that will train me to avoid that irritating behavior. I think the reason that spanking works is that it underlines the offense. I remember how unhappy I was because I forgot to set up the coffee pot. So, setting up the coffee pot stays in the front of my mind. If I start to push it back and forget to do it, I get a fresh reminder.
It works. Yes, being spanked provides me with sexual fuel. It also makes me remember to do or not do whatever it was that earned me all that pain. Go figure!