This morning, I was working on one project and Lion was working on another. He called me over to ask me something, I answered and walked away. I heard him say something along the lines of “you’re never around when I want you.” I growled that I was trying to do something and he’s not the only person in the house. However… he was talking to the dog. My first renewed foray into growling at him and he was talking to the dog. Yeah. That sounds about right.
Apparently I need to count to ten before I growl. I’ve growled at Lion before, both in the moment and after a little while. Neither one feels particularly comfortable to me yet. And I have to figure out how to come back to the subject down the road without giving him the dreaded “we have to talk”. My daughter is studying to be a psychologist (she jokes it’s to diagnose the family) and she’s learned that the “when you do X, it makes me feel Y” used on so many TV sitcoms is real. It’s much better than “you always/never do X”. Lion is very sensitive to criticism. Generally, he’ll say he’s a horrible person for doing whatever I’ve pointed out. Maybe it depends on how I approach it. I don’t believe I bare my teeth and jump up and down in front of him accusingly, but maybe that’s what he feels. I’m famous for reading tones into emails and texts that don’t exist.
We were watching “The Good Doctor” the other night and one of the characters was quarantined with his wife because he’s had cancer and going to work would put him at too much risk. He’s able to have meetings online and be involved that way. His wife keeps bursting into the room and asking him questions or running the blender loudly while he’s in meetings. Then she goes out without realizing that if she’s exposed to the virus, she can expose him. She’s basically driving him crazy and he yells at her. It was interesting to watch the TV show with a couple go through that in a non-sitcom setting.
It wasn’t meant to be funny. It was actually showing what some people are dealing with being stuck home together during the quarantine. By the end of the episode, of course, they’ve solved their problems. And we both realized how lucky we are that we don’t have that problem.
Lion is very considerate when I’m working from home, as I am when he works from home. He asks if the TV will bother me. I don’t usually make a lot of noise anyway, but I’m used to having music on and people on the phone or talking loudly around me. The only issue I have when I work from home is that the damn dog needs to go out all the time and I’m the only one who can let her out. Lion can try, but she usually won’t go out for him if I’m home. Silly dog.
Now that I’m following Lion’s suggestion of growling rather than spanking (I know he said I can do either, but I like the growling better. Baby steps.), I have to work on how I’m going to accomplish it. If this morning is any indication, I think I’m willing to do it. I just have to make sure he’s talking to me and not the dog when I growl.
Listen to this post.