Lion hasn’t wanted sex for a few nights. I’m not sure why, but I don’t think it’s a problem. Last night he picked from the Box O’Fun but got butt plug and neither of us wanted that. I allowed him to pick again and he got a free pass. I can’t even remember what a free pass means. I know he has do-over cards, which means he can pick again. So free pass could mean he gets to choose or we skip playing and just have sex. I think it was the former. At any rate, he asked if we could just have sex and I agreed. We had a big dinner and he wanted to let that settle more before we started. But then we never started.
As I said, I don’t think it’s a big deal. We’ve both been tired and we spent a few hours fighting with the satellite dish on the camper. It still doesn’t work, but I was up and down the ladder a lot causing my back to tighten up. It was fine after dinner and I would have been up for anything. Maybe I need to do more than just bring out the Box O’Fun. Is it possible the box has become boring already? Maybe he needs me to take a more active role in things. I thought I was by bringing out the box. Maybe I need to just show up with Icy Hot or clothespins and tell him that’s what we’re doing. Maybe I should punish him when he hits the limit of not wanting sex. [Lion — Sounds good to me.]
What’s the limit? I don’t know. I guess it would depend on when I think there’s a problem. If he can’t tell me a reason, (i.e. he’s depressed about X or he’s tired or his tummy hurts) then maybe he needs to be encouraged to come up with one or meet the painful end of a paddle. That may seem extreme, but part of FLRD is communication. If he can’t, or won’t, communicate then I need to put my foot down. I’m not saying he’s annoying me by not wanting sex. I’m just trying to keep things moving so we don’t wind up in the vicious cycle of inertia.
Life has been very unpredictable lately. It’s easy to become depressed. I can’t tell you how much of a pep talk I have to give myself to get up in the morning, or even to do the dishes after dinner. Why bother? We’ll all be dead soon because people refuse to wear masks. The news reports the death toll every day. There’s very little good news. But we have to do what we can to keep ourselves going. If it takes swatting Lion so he’ll communicate better, then that’s what I’ll do.