Friday night Mrs. Lion spanked me. I was being punished for forgetting to set up the coffee pot for the next morning. We’ve had domestic discipline in place for a few years now. Like everything else we do, it’s evolved. At first, for me at least, it was a sexy, humiliating fantasy come true. My memory of that tingly sexual heat returned when I read Julie’s latest post about receiving a punishment spanking. It was her first and carried a strongly mixed message of sexual humiliation, contrition, and arousal. Mostly, I suspect, arousal. (Click here to read her post).
Let’s face it, there is something very hot about the kind of surrender becoming the disciplined partner creates. It’s useful as long as it doesn’t overpower the real purpose of DD. It’s my sexual anticipation of a spanking that puts me in position to receive one. I’m not sure it sets the right tone for discipline, but it’s been effective for us.
Over time, my arousal at the thought of being punished has declined dramatically. Part of the reason is that my actual spankings are more intense. I absolutely hate them. As the time for the punishment grows near, any arousal I might have felt disappears and has been replaced by a sense of dread. I know what’s coming and I don’t like it a bit.
My strong sexual attraction to spanking prepared me for real punishment. If you read back through the last few years of our blog, you’ll see that my sexual interest was very high at the thought of being spanked. You’ll probably note that over time, the sexual pleasure and sense of naughty humiliation disappeared. I think this is normal.
The cause of this change in attitude came from Mrs. Lion adopting a serious attitude towards punishing me. Her objective was to make me sorry I committed an offense. Spanking wasn’t something designed to turn me on. I just have to endure the punishment. She isn’t interested in my feedback. She knows what she has to do and does it very well. I don’t feel humiliated because others are never involved and she doesn’t give me a time out in the corner or any other punishment desserts. That means I don’t have time to think about what happened. I can just roll over, feel my ass burning, turn on the TV and act as though nothing had happened.
Mrs. Lion doesn’t make punishing me an event. It’s just something she has to do. I know it isn’t fun for her and I know she doesn’t want it to be fun for me. She tells me to get in position. She has already selected the paddle she wants to use and she begins as soon as I’m available. She ignores the sounds I make or complaints I may offer. She goes about her business without a word. When she’s done, she informs me that she’s finished and she walks away.
This is definitely not what most of us fantasize about when we think about DD. However, it’s the reality I live with. Ironically, even though the spankings have been very painful, they don’t seem to have a lasting effect. I know Mrs. Lion would prefer that I feel the fruit of her labor the next day. I could offer suggestions on how she can do that. However, I won’t unless she asks.
The one thing that hasn’t happened, even though we are together all day and night, is spanking me in close proximity to when I commit the offense. For example, Mrs. Lion waited a day after discovering my failure to set up the coffeepot. If she announced to me that I had forgotten the next morning when she had to set up the pot herself, and immediately spanked me, I think it would’ve made a deeper impression.
My theory is that punishing in close proximity to the offense ties the spanking closely together with the reason I get it. Waiting many hours makes the spanking the event more than punishment for doing something wrong. Obviously, I know what I did and I’m sorry because I didn’t like the punishment one little bit. I just think it might’ve made a stronger impression if I was spanked as soon as she came in to tell me that she had to set up the coffeepot herself.
Of course, this input doesn’t matter. Mrs. Lion is in charge and if I ever doubt it, a maintenance spanking will remind me. By the way, that’s what they’re for.
punishment is punishment. waiting for the punishment is a mental form. Punishment is meant to change behavior and not sexual. That meaning said. If Mrs Lion enjoyed spanking you She could easily give you a sensual spanking now and then just to surprise you. But if She does not derive pleasure in that why should She, after all who is in charge?
Happy Easter.
She’s said many times that she doesn’t particularly enjoy it. She doesn’t because I need it. I don’t get any particular dread out of waiting. I do tend to forget why I’m being punished. That’s why it’s helpful to administer it as soon as possible after the offense. Happy Easter.
The prolonged dread and escalating fear and anxiety from waiting are part of the punishment. I had a pro specifically tell me that. She had me close to vomiting by the time she did it, which made it easier for her to break me. I knew that I might not be OK and that I might not be able to handle it, and waiting as that reality became cleared and more palpable was truly awful.
I doubt you will ever be broken like that, but it changes your perspective, I can assure you. As far as I can tell, your wife has not made it a goal to do that to you. Query how she would react if you completely lost if and began to beg and sob uncontrollably. Some guys describe it as a goal to be broken like that, but once you are, you will never look at the woman who did it to you the same.
I’m pretty sure that Mrs. Lion’s goal is nowhere near breaking me. She wants to achieve a certain degree of discomfort that hopefully lasts a day or two. I share her level of interest. I don’t want to be push that far. If it happens, I don’t think it will change the way I look at her.