Personally, I think it stands to reason that I’m off my game. Do I miss working? I guess I miss the structure and, yes, I miss some of the people. We tell each other stupid things we’ve done, like when I put dinner in the oven for a half-hour only to realize I never turned the oven on. I thought Lion enjoyed these silly stories or the outrageous thing someone did that management ignored. I think we all vent about the latter when we get home. Now I’m always home. There are no funny stories, except on Facebook.

Right now, every day feels like a weekend day. On weekends, we wake up a little later and lounge in bed a little longer. I’ll go write my post and Lion will go in his office. We usually make plans to go out and that trip can take up most of the day. Since I took a break from unpacking, I haven’t really gotten anything done. Today, I’ll head back into the realm of unpacking. Time to get my butt in gear.

Lion says he’s been initiating everything. Again, he’s working. He knows how long he needs to spend doing whatever projects he’s working on. He knows when his meetings are scheduled. A few times, when I’ve come home from work and tried to kiss him while he was working, he’s made me feel like I was interrupting so I try to keep that to a minimum. From now on, when I see him heading for the bedroom, I will follow him.

I maintain that we still talk to each other. We talk about the latest news from President Buffoon since that’s really the only news on anymore. How many cases of the virus there are and how many deaths and how stupid it is that there aren’t enough supplies for doctors and nurses to do their jobs. We watch reruns of comedies and laugh together. Our “platonic” snuggling last night actually started out like any other snuggling until Lion said he was tired. I figured that meant he didn’t want to play. He said I’ve never let that stop me before. (It has.) I didn’t know he was already hurt that we hadn’t done anything earlier in the day.

Things are a little strained right now. I generally give him a kiss after each eye drop but those kisses have felt more platonic since last night. When I was cleaning up from dinner, I noticed he hadn’t put the coffee pot together. Sometimes he remembers later. By this morning, he still hadn’t done it. No, it’s not a big deal for me to do it but it is a punishable offense. I wrestled with telling him he’d forgotten. He might have left it because he figured I’ve given up so why shouldn’t he. He might have told me he didn’t realize he’d forgotten but what difference does it make because he’s just work for me. Maybe he just truly forgot. He hadn’t gotten his mid-morning coffee, which is when he normally puts the coffee pot together. I decided I could handle whatever response he gave me and informed him that he was in trouble. He did really forget and he’ll get his swats right after lunch. Dessert swats, if you will.

I have no idea if he’ll be in the mood for punishment after lunch or not. It doesn’t really make a difference either way. I wasn’t really in the mood to be told I don’t like him anymore when I read his post. We’re both a little raw right now although I’m sure he’ll say he’s the injured party. I guess there’s no better way to wake 4.0 up than telling her she’s slacking. Now he’ll definitely be the injured party.

I think that something is wrong. Mrs. Lion has been writing about how she would use some of her free time to play during the day. She also talked about taking care of some things here at the house. After Wednesday’s diaper assignment and handjob (Not to orgasm, of course.), nothing sexual has happened. When it was too late last night, I asked her if something was going on. She said she just didn’t feel like it. I can understand that on one level, but on another more significant level, it doesn’t make a lot of sense to me.

For years sexual attention to me has been absolutely one-sided. Mrs. Lion just isn’t interested in sex for herself. I suppose I am her favorite charity. She’s been extremely kind and has been a wonderful partner. She’s done this through all sorts of difficulties. I’m deeply appreciative.

Now, when there’s no real pressure, I feel a distance. Last night, about 9 o’clock she snuggled with me in a platonic kind of way. I like that. It was odd only because when she does this she normally lets me know why she’s avoiding sex.

Something has changed. I’m not sure what it is, but definitely the wind has changed direction. Even though we spend our days less than 20 feet apart, I recognized yesterday that I initiate all the contact. It could be that she’s finally had enough of me.

Another idea is that the real fun in her life comes while she’s at work. Now that she has no job, for now, she buried herself in various video games. I think I see less of her now than I did when she was at the office all day.

She’s never been particularly articulate about telling me how she feels. She always liked to tell me about what happened at work. She always makes a point about how she laughs with her officemates. I’m starting to realize that all her real sharing goes on there. Needless to say, this is very sad for me. I’ve always suspected that our sexual interaction has been a kind of chore for her. I hoped it was one she enjoyed. Now, I’m not so sure. I’m also not so sure that she’s particularly fond of my company.

I know she loves me. She knows I love her. That’s never been in question. We’ll do anything for each other. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that she’s very fond of my company. I can’t think of the last time I’ve made her laugh. Even when she makes me do silly things, she doesn’t show any real joy.

Yes, we are very comfortable with each other. We could spend years alone together in this house without any real stress. That doesn’t mean that we will be having fun. We’ll be comfortable and Mrs. Lion will indulge some of my sexual needs. You won’t hear the sound of us laughing.

I might not have recognized this if we weren’t forced to be home. Generally, when we have time off, we either take care of chores or go on a trip in our trailer. This is very different. It could be a lot of fun. Maybe we just don’t have that much in common. Maybe over the years, we’ve learned how to work around that. I don’t think it’s working now.

[Mrs. Lion — I do seem to be floundering a bit. I keep thinking I have things to do but I’m off for a month. Do I really need to do things right now? But I also know that month will be gone before I know it. As far as Lion is concerned, I don’t see what he’s talking about. I’ve always been flaky about playing with him. From my point of view, things are normal. He’s working so I leave him to it. He’s the one who has structure right now. If he wants me to interrupt him by waving a butt plug in his face, I can do that. I’ll just have to make sure it’s not during one of his videoconferences.]

lion spread eagle tied to bed
Large plastic clothespins on Lion’s balls. (Click to view larger)

Lion worked a long time yesterday. When he came out of his office, he said he was going for a shower. It’s a good thing. I assume he was stinky from his diaper. I told him he didn’t need to wear one after his shower. That would have defeated the purpose of getting clean.

I won’t say I had plans for him. I had no idea what I was going to do. I only knew he wanted to play earlier in the day. Eventually, I decided on clothespins. The bag right beside my bed didn’t have wooden ones. There were some small, plastic ones that aren’t as evil as the dollhouse clothespins. There were also some plastic ones the same size as wooden ones. Of course, those plastic are worse than wooden but absolutely not as bad as the tiny plastic ones.

I think the tiny ones are much worse because all of the force is concentrated in such a small area. The fact that I use them in such a sensitive area just adds to the fun. The larger the clothespin, the more area the force has to dissipate. Obviously, if I put the larger plastic ones on the head of his penis, it would be far more painful. There’s no way that sensitive spot could handle it.

Lion was reasonably hard when the clothespins were on. He was still hard when I took them off. I guess they weren’t enough to get him too excited though. It took a fairly long time to get him anywhere near the edge. As it was, I gave out before he got there. When I tried to continue, he started to get soft. This isn’t a big deal. He had fun while it lasted and he wasn’t going to have an orgasm anyway. Edging him would have just made him hornier. Edging him today will have the same effect.

Just before bed, Lion’s back started to hurt. The man who can tell me if a paddle produces a sting or a thud is generally unable to tell me the quality of pain he’s experiencing. With all of his surgeries, I’ve asked if the pain is stabbing or constant, sharp or dull, muscle or bone, etc. and he’s rarely able to tell me. His back still hurts today but, I’m guessing, not as much. I don’t know if he’ll be in the mood for play later. Whatever the case, I’ll be available for all his play or snuggling needs.

I spent yesterday wearing a diaper. I really don’t like that. Mrs. Lion knows it and that’s why she makes me wear one every so often. It’s just another way she lets me know who’s in charge. She let me be wild again after my shower yesterday afternoon. She also played with me (sexually) after my shower. This was our first afternoon session in a long time. It felt great but I was unable to get to the edge. This seems to be the pattern recently. If history is the predictor, starting today I should be able to reach the edge.

So far, we’ve been having a good time. We like each other’s company and having this opportunity to be together 24 hours a day is a lot of fun. I am working from home and so is everyone else from my company. Thanks to very good technology, we have video meetings when we need to talk. I’ll tell you a little secret: they can’t see it, but I’m wearing nothing but a T-shirt. Yesterday, it was a T-shirt and a diaper.

We got a few surly comments complaining that with COVID-19 it was wrong for us to talk about sex. I deleted those ridiculous remarks. Lest anyone forget, this is a sex blog. We are supposed to write about sex; at least our version of it.

Other bloggers are more active. Being home gives them more opportunities to write. Also, I believe we share a responsibility to provide more reading material to entertain our shelter-in-place readers. I’m used to this sort of isolation. Mrs. Lion has always preferred it. I do understand that most everybody else has to compensate for this radical change in human contact. This is one time that being solitary critters is a distinct advantage.

I wonder why it is still so difficult to buy toilet paper or paper towels. By this time, you’d think everybody had more than enough. Distilleries have started making hand sanitizer. I guess that’s a good thing. Nobody has said whether or not using the sanitizers actually kills the coronavirus. Apparently, the consensus is that it’s a good idea to use these products. They are made out of glycerin and grain alcohol. Alcohol is not the best antimicrobial agent. I suppose it’s better than nothing. We use Provon soap for handwashing. This is the stuff that our Hospital and medical center use. Hopefully, that will keep us safer.

I suspect that Mrs. Lion has more fun and games planned for me. She is able to structure her days and take naps if she wants them. Perhaps she will have more energy for fun. She is bound to tell you before she tells me. If you’ve noticed, my morning post is coming in much later. We are on Pacific daylight time and I have been writing my post at about 9 AM. Usually, I write it the day before.

I’m sure I will have more interesting stuff to write about tomorrow. I just wanted to let you know how we’re doing. As of now, we’re both healthy and very happy to be home together. I’m still collecting my paycheck which makes things a lot simpler. See you tomorrow.