Mrs. Lion always denies it, but she’s definitely making some changes. Perhaps lioness 4.0 is arriving. On Tuesday night she spanked me. I had spilled on my shirt during the day and self-reported the infraction to her. We had an email exchange when I did. She wondered if she should punish me for things I did that she didn’t catch. She also wondered if I did have a self-reporting requirement, did that mean she had to check the laundry to be sure I didn’t “miss” anything. I suggested that she could spot-check the laundry, but didn’t have to. She agreed that self-reporting is a good idea.
She started the spanking with me in the milking position (kneeling, butt up in the air, legs apart). I was yelping loudly right from the start. Boy did that hurt! I couldn’t stay in that position and asked her if I could return to our traditional over-the-edge-of-the-bed position. She agreed. I was a little surprised that she kept going with me in the new position. It didn’t hurt any less but I was able to hold still. She used the rubber paddle and didn’t draw any blood. My ass was on fire! I felt it for hours. About an hour after the spanking, she edged me using her mouth. It was odd feeling pleasure on one side and pain on the other.
Yesterday morning, I emailed her and mentioned that I thought 4.0 was on the way. I expressed my amazement at how much this spanking hurt. I also said that it was almost impossible to stay in the milking position during a spanking. She replied that she can make me squirm in any position. I was a little surprised by that statement. I don’t ever recall her being so objective about her spanking ability.
She went on to say that she liked the milking position because it’s easier to find my sit spot and she can more easily hit the inside of my crack. It’s hard to argue with that. I suggested that maybe we try a stack of pillows for me to be over which would supply support and keep me in the position she likes. She suggested that we can try the milking position with wooden paddles. Maybe that would make it easier for me to stay in that position. I doubt that because it isn’t the paddle but the effect she desires that makes it hard to stay still. She wants loud yelping and squirming. She’s perfectly capable of producing both with any paddle we have.
In our email exchange, I mentioned that this spanking felt very different than the other ones. I could feel her sense of objectivity about what she was doing. It was clear to me that she wanted to hurt as much as possible. I mentioned in an email that it was a good thing. After all, I should hate being spanked but get turned on thinking about it. That is exactly what happened yesterday. I got turned on thinking about it but truly don’t look forward to more.
This may not seem like much of a change. It really is. I’ve encouraged Mrs. Lion to be binary about punishment. That is, if I’ve earned a spanking, I should get one. It shouldn’t really matter if the offense was minor. The spanking should be just as painful as if I did something more serious. That may sound counterintuitive, but I think it makes sense. If the intensity of the spanking varies based on the “seriousness” of the offense, then I will worry less about spilling than about interrupting, for example.
I agree that annoying Mrs. Lion is more serious than food on my shirt, but doing anything requiring punishment is almost equally serious because I failed to obey my lioness. If she feels I require more than a standard spanking, she has other things she can do. I know this is different from what I said before when I discussed the idea of misdemeanors and felonies. Punishment I think, is binary. I either get it or I don’t. When I get it, it should make me unhappy and make me regret what I did.
It’s taken both of us a long time to get to this point. Part of the problem is that neither of us had any experience with corporal punishment. More difficult is the fact that I like being spanked. Mrs. Lion has always considered spanking me something that I want and need. I do. I think that’s true in every domestic discipline relationship.
Here’s the tricky part: Wanting and needing spanking suggests that I control what happens. Of course, I don’t decide when I get or don’t get spanked. Perhaps unconsciously Mrs. Lion thought that meant I should control the intensity as well. When I wrote about wanting stronger spankings, she tried to accommodate me. She’s done a great job. At some point, I think she realized that punishment is something I shouldn’t control. Tuesday’s spanking was clearly punishment and considerably more painful than one controlled by me would be.
I think that’s lioness 4.0. She doesn’t care if I think my spanking is too painful. In fact, she wants me to think that it is. Her emails with me made it clear that she had an objective that didn’t include my opinion. That’s exactly how it should be. It’s my job to find a way to stay in position until she’s finished punishing me. If I move, like Tuesday night, she calmly waits for me to settle down and goes on.
For the record, in the calm of the day after, I am happy that I am relieved of the responsibility for determining anything about my punishments. From my perspective, this is an important difference. For the first time, Mrs. Lion had no interest in whether or not I thought I was done with my spanking. That’s as it should be.