After a few years of a Female Led Relationship with Discipline (FLRD), there really isn’t a lot of new stuff happening. The same is true of enforced male chastity. Orgasm denial doesn’t have a lot of variation. It’s true that in our case, at least, we try different male chastity devices and we have an ongoing effort to successfully adopt corporal punishment. We write about both.
We also write about how these practices integrate into our marriage. In the beginning, it’s easy to let the novelty of spanking, edging, and chastity hardware take center stage. Fortunately for us, we recognized early on that if we were going to do these things permanently, they had to fit in with the much more important aspects of our relationship.
For one thing, Mrs. Lion would need to feel a decent measure of comfort doing all these things. Most difficult, I think, was learning to punish me. It’s a pretty big leap to understand that she has to hurt me to make me happy. Once she understands that, then she has to learn how to put it nto action.
I understand that reading about spanking and fantasizing about it turns a lot of people on. Unfortunately, there isn’t a lot of overlap between the people who get off on spanking and those who are fans of enforced male chastity. That means we aren’t always pleasing all of our readers. It’s true that this blog started out talking about male chastity. Our relationship drifted in the direction of Mrs. Lion being in charge of more than sex. As it did, our writing followed along.
At this point, the combination of FLRD and orgasm denial work seamlessly for us. That doesn’t mean we’ve integrated our disciplinary relationship with my enforced chastity. The opposite is true. Sex or the withholding of it are never rewards or punishment. I think this is a good example for vanilla couples. It’s entirely too easy to transfer arguments into the bedroom. Sex can be a very powerful weapon. It’s also very destructive.
Mrs. Lion controls when and if I get to ejaculate without any regard to what else is happening in our lives. If she or I are tired, she will put sexual activity on hold. That makes sense to both of us. She gets genuine pleasure out of making me very horny. She loves giving me orgasms. She has to figure out how to balance those two pleasures.
At the same time, she enforces her authority with her paddles and other unpleasant punishments. It’s not uncommon for her to spank me severely, soap my mouth, or make me sit in the corner and then an hour later tease me until I beg for release.
One of the best things about FLRD is that there is a mechanism to express anger and then let go of the bad feelings. It’s not easy to do this. Mrs. Lion is working on it, but she still has a way to go. When lioness 3.0 finally gets here, I think she will have managed to finally master this important skill. Equally important, is that I get to understand that once I’m punished for something, I need not feel any guilt. I’m confident that if I repeat the offense, my punishment will be much more severe and eventually I will learn my lesson.
I don’t think either of us seriously believed that spanking and FLRD would have a significant impact on our relationship. From the very start, we’ve been happily married. There are times I’ve upset Mrs. Lion. When I do, it’s very hard to get her to explain what I did before she forgives me. Fortunately these are rare events. Now, with our disciplinary relationship it’s becoming much easier for her. That means it’s better for me. She understands that she has the tools to change me for the better.
There’s no question that I’m happier as a result of all this. I love the power exchanges. I really like to get spanked; at least anticipate getting spanked. And I like knowing that Mrs. Lion has a path to correct me when I upset her. Believe it or not, the stuff really works.