I’m still not getting very aroused when Mrs. Lion plays with me. On Sunday night I asked her to try oral stimulation. She did and it didn’t work. I asked her to try the Magic Wand. She did, and it didn’t work. I’m starting to think that I’m broken.
In the back of my mind I always have a little fear that maybe my libido has decided to shut off. I’m not ready for that. It certainly would take the fun out of all the stuff we write about here. I know Mrs. Lion won’t give up and I still hope that this is a strictly temporary situation.
On Sunday we were interviewed by Mark and Rebecca for their podcast “All The Sex”. We talked about enforced male chastity and our Female Led Relationship with Discipline (FLRD). It was a fun conversation. Mark admitted that he liked it when Rebecca spanked him. He wasn’t sure that a disciplinary spanking would work with him since he said he laughs when she spanks him hard.
Mrs. Lion suggested that she may not have the right tools. We mentioned heavy, mean paddles. I suspect that with practice he’ll be yelping too. It struck me that the idea of adult spanking didn’t surprise them. Let’s face it, here in the blog we are talking to people who already accept these practices. Mark and Rebecca don’t practice FLRD yet still enjoy female-spanking-male fun.
They also play with chastity. Like many people, she locks up his penis for a weekend or a bit longer, and uses it as a source of play. I think that as more and more people learn about the existence of male chastity devices, they will be used for this kind of couple fun.
Later, Sunday night, Mrs. Lion spanked me for two offenses: I failed to thank her for my spanking the week before, and I forgot to remind her that Saturday was punishment day. It was a longer, more severe spanking. I estimate I got about 200 swats before she finished. She commented that this was back to her pre-surgical punishments. I’m not sure I fully agree. I think I got off a bit easy. That’s not to say that I would be happy if he hit me longer and harder, but if I were to rate this spanking on a scale of 1 to 10, I’d give it a six.
If you wonder what I think a standard punishment spanking should rate, I’d reluctantly suggest eight or nine. I think we’ve both given up on spankings having a lasting effect on me. Apparently, I am annoyingly difficult to mark.
The thing is, it doesn’t seem to matter if every spanking has a high rating. If it makes me yelp it’s powerful enough to contribute to conditioning my behavior. The intensity, I think, goes to how hard I will consciously try to avoid repeating the offense. A level-nine spanking will get my attention for some time. A level 5 or 6 will probably be forgotten a few days after it was received.
Having said that, my unconscious conditioning is affected to the same degree after a medium-strength spanking or a very severe one. As I wrote last week, intensity of punishment may be a factor in my sexual arousal. I know there’s a connection between being controlled and getting aroused.
On Sunday night, before trying to edge me, Mrs. Lion covered my balls with clothespins. All that did was annoy me. For no good reason it was just unpleasant. I’m pretty sure that was because I’m so worried about my inability to get to ejaculation. My focus is laser-sharp on getting to the edge. The clothespins felt like a distraction.
I don’t think that Mrs. Lion did the wrong thing. She had no way to know how focused I was. I’m sure on other occasions clothespins will be welcome play. Part of me wants to get locked up in the Jail Bird and left to marinate for a week or more. I’m starting to hate the feeling I get when I just can’t get more aroused.
Actually, I think it would be a big mistake to retreat into the cage as a way of avoiding these disappointing sessions. I think we have to keep trying or we just have to give up. I can’t imagine myself as an asexual critter.
In the meantime, nothing else has to change. Our FLRD doesn’t depend on my ability to ejaculate. Wearing a chastity device becomes sort of supercilious when the penis it encloses isn’t interested in sex. Of course, I know full well that the more important value wearing the device has for me is a reminder that I belong to Mrs. Lion.