Yesterday was uneventful. We had frozen (heated, of course) pizza and vegged out in bed watching TV and playing games on our iPads. Just your average American couple. This is our usual pattern the day after I get an orgasm. I suppose we’ve fallen into a rut that way. We’ve both been very tired lately. We’re not sleeping well. Maybe it’s the change of the seasons. The weather here is cooling off. It’s dark early in the evening and we wake up to darkness as well. We get about eight hours of daylight in the winter.
Mrs. Lion has been resolving to bring out the Box O’Fun to see if that will get us back in the habit of playing. I wonder if there is some kind of expiration date on sexual power exchanges; a point when the energy expended exceeds the benefits of maintaining it.
Over the years, I’ve seen countless relationships burn through their power exchanges. The average life appears to be a year or two. I’ve hoped that we can beat this. We have so far. We’re just ending our fifth year. But it sometimes feels like a struggle to keep going.
It isn’t that I want to rebel and stop obeying Mrs. Lion. Obedience to her is second nature to me. For her part, she expects me to follow my rules and listen to her. In that sense, the power exchange is obviously permanent. That could be the problem. Our FLRD is no longer top of mind. It just is.
That’s the goal, right? I’m not so sure. I think that getting there is way more than half the fun. We’ve arrived at the point where punishment is very rare. Awareness that we’re doing something unusual is pretty much gone too.
A good example of this happened this past weekend. We had a house guest; a friend of mine from high school. She, of course, was totally unaware of our FLRD. One morning, Mrs. Lion prepared breakfast. She served our guest first who dove right in. Next I got my food and, of course, waited for Mrs. Lion to eat first. Her breakfast was not quite ready. So I waited. Mrs. Lion told me that I could begin. It didn’t occur to either of us that our guest might find that giving of permission a bit unusual. She didn’t.
Later, I thought about it. Was this behavior something you might expect from a vanilla couple? I suppose it could be. Should we have been aware that my needing permission to eat could be seen as odd? Obviously we didn’t. I think that is a sign that her role is integrated into our vanilla lives.
That was what we wanted. We are closer than before we started. I guess we have to decide if we need to find ways to extend our trip. I think we do. Arriving isn’t nearly as much fun as getting there.