Big Ring And Little Cage

Deciding on a male chastity device isn’t easy. The motive for wearing one is usually based on a desire to transfer sexual control to another person, the keyholder. Once the device is locked on, all sorts of hot things can happen. It’s ironic, but some of us get turned on by not being allowed to get aroused.

Go figure.

That’s not the only inherent contradiction embodied in male chastity. Take the device. It’s supposed to be an escape-proof vault that prevents erection and orgasm. Its wearer is only able to pee. Otherwise, the penis is useless unless released by the keyholder.

That’s the fantasy. Of course, male chastity is a consensual sport that is almost always initiated by the man. Women don’t generally spend a lot of time thinking about penises. If they do, it’s about how one can provide them with pleasure, not how to lock them up.

The idea of penis bondage is a male concept. Some women like the idea once it’s introduced to them, but it is unlikely they will be obsessed about the mechanism to do it. Mrs. Lion is happy using a short length of lightweight rope for the purpose. Concern about the hardware is on me alone.

Guys with experience, or newbies who take the time to do some research, discover that practical devices for male chastity aren’t inescapable prisons. In fact, the general solution to caging a penis is a tube or cage connected to a ring around the penis and balls. The ring has to be small enough to prevent a ball from slipping out if is worn without the cage. Any smaller is asking for discomfort.

.Please note that I didn’t say tight enough to make escape impossible. A lot of guys, even men who should know better, keep trying tighter and tighter base rings. At some point, they resort to lube to reduce the pain caused by the friction of a tight ring. Even with a scrotum-choking ring, escape is absolutely possible since the penis can be worked out without removing the ring.

That’s the thing. Any device held on by a band around cock and balls can be escaped. Devices can make the process very painful, but escape is still a possibility. A lot of pain and expense can be spared by just accepting this fact. Remember, you agreed to wear it. What’s the point of trying to get out?

Ironically, many guys look for the roomiest cage possible. The want a constricting base ring attached to a cage their penises swim in. I think this choice is the result of a anatomical misunderstanding. Most guys think about their penises when they are hard, or remember things that happened when they were aroused. A hard penis needs its space. It hurts to try to compress it too much. So, the reasoning goes, if a hard cock can be hurt by fencing it in, a soft one has a similar vulnerability.

To a large degree that’s not true. A soft weenie is very compressible. You can easily press the head and make it less than an inch long. You would be less successful squeezing the head to make it have a smaller diameter. The conclusion: a penis cage can be very short but needs to be wide enough to avoid too much squeezing .

From my experience, the most comfortable and erection-proof cages are very short, but wide enough to only compress the diameter by a quarter of an inch or so. My flaccid penis is about 2-1/2 inches in length most of the time. It can be much shorter after a cold dip in the pool, and quite a bit longer for no good reason.

I’ve discovered that those measurements have no real importance in fitting a chastity device. In my case, I’m very much at home in a cage measuring 1-1/4 inches in length. Your experience may vary. I would suggest that all but the most enormous cocks will live happily in a cage under two inches long.

My point is that fitting a chastity device is counter intuitive for most guys. Most important is comfort; least important, security. The base ring should be large enough for comfort without having a ball slip out when it is worn without the cage. The cage itself should be only slightly narrower in diameter than its occupant, but should be a lot shorter. A good gauge of length is the size after a nice, cold swim. You get the idea.

Try the idea out with an inexpensive, Chinese cage. Dhgate.com has lots of them. You may be surprised by how good it feels to go wide on the ring and short on the cage.

4 Comments

  1. My partner has been spanking me for a few years but until recently neither of us had thought about chastity. Then a few weeks ago she said she did not like the idea that I might masturbate while she was out shopping or visiting a girlfriend etc. By chance I had come across your website shortly before then, so I suggested to her that a chastity cage might be the answer. She could lock me up before she went out and release me when she came back. We are not really interested in long term chastity.
    She thought it would be a good idea, so I bought a cheap chastity cage from a sex shop and, exactly as you say, I found that a small cage is no problem but a small ring is. You mention that Mrs Lion is happy using a short length of lightweight rope. How does she use it exactly, is the rope a substitute for the ring of the chastity device?
    Before I close, many thanks to you both for your excellent website which we have found extremely helpful and much more realistic than so many of the others.

    1. Author

      The reference to a length of rope for a chastity device was tongue in cheek. You do need a device.

  2. I think I remember you mentioning that you had tried a piercing-type device, and it didn’t work out for you. However, some stories are more successful than others… I have a heavily customized Lori #1 device, which is lightweight despite being made of stainless steel. It’s also absolutely secure, against both removal and being able to achieve an orgasm. (My wife enjoys my struggles when I try to defeat the device, but can’t, either while she’s teasing me or on my own. The “no masturbation” restriction doesn’t exist in our relationship.)

    Reading various groups on FetLife will provide many other success stories. For example, many (most?) of the SteelWerks devices are designed for piercings, and the light weight titanium allows them to be eminently wearable. An added benefit is that a Prince Albert (“PA”) piercing is a Lot Of Fun on its own, and with the right kind of jewelry can be quite pleasurable for both partners during penetrative sex.

    Although getting a PA may seem intimidating, it’s really not a big deal – it’s pretty much the easiest of all piercings to heal, and infection rates are vanishingly small because of the mildly acidic, sterile rinse it gets several times per day. For me anyway (and typically), the pain was less than a good toe stub.

    A piercing is certainly not necessary to have a good time with a chastity lifestyle, but the additional feeling of security, and the mindset that creates, definitely enhances the game a lot for me.

    1. Author

      Actually, the very first chastity device I reviewed in the 90’s was Lori’s first tube. I had a frenum piercing (which was required then). It was a nightmare to lock on and worse to wear. It was very heavy and hurt me after only an hour or two of wear. Over the years, I’v tried other devices she makes. They simply don’t work for me.

      Consider this: The weak spot in a device fixed by a piercing, is the metal that goes through the hole in your penis. A determined engineer with the right equipment could probably remove it. But that’s not the point. For me, at least, inescapability isn’t even on my list. Comfort comes first. I finally removed my barbell and let the piercing heal. Mrs. Lion never found it entertaining. I don’t miss it. In fact, I have a wider range of chastity device choices since I don’t have to accommodate piercing hardware.To each his own!

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