The Big Chastity Myth

Enforced Chastity is a surprisingly simple kink. No special BDSM skills are required. Normally, two people play, but one can play with no problem at all. Chastity devices have evolved into simple, two-piece units; a base ring through which the balls and penis are threaded, and a cage or tube that encloses the penis. The cage is locked onto the base ring. Voila!

There are two main reasons that men wear chastity devices. The most popular is as a form of sexual bondage. Wearing a chastity device restricts erection and makes orgasm difficult-to-impossible. The second reason is as genital jewelry. Very expensive, elaborate chastity devices are often custom made for clients who enjoy this form of jewelry.

There’s a lot of mythology surrounding enforced male chastity. The most popular is that the keyholder locks a willing male into a chastity device. Once securely imprisoned, he is told he may never get out. He will never have another orgasm. Some variation of this fuels many sexy dreams about male chastity. Some overactive male imaginations realize that for this fantasy to come true, the device must be inescapable. This starts a quest for the chastity device that would confound Houdini. This, of course, fails the test of common sense. Men are locked into chastity devices because they want to be. The practice is entirely consensual.

When you strip away the drama and hyperbole of the male chastity myths, it all boils down to sexual control. The chastity device provides a realistic illusion of sexual helplessness. As long as the device is attached, its wearer can’t get an erection or have an orgasm. Eliminating the obvious reality that escape is possible, if uncomfortable, the keyholder controls any sexual pleasure the wearer can have.

A lot of guys who want to be locked up, also want to be “forced” to provide sexual and domestic services for their keyholders. This is a central theme in many fantasies. The rationalization is that once sexual pleasure is prevented, the male will become so desperate for release that he will do anything, even iron or give his keyholder oral orgasms, in order to earn an orgasm for himself. Over time, according to the myths, the male will lose interest in his own satisfaction and get sexual pleasure out of giving orgasms to his keyholder.

There’s a big problem with this myth. What woman would want oral sex from a man who is only willing to do it because he wants his cock out of a chastity device? The arousing myth is being “forced” to give pleasure to his keyholder. It’s fine to think that way, but consider how insulting it is to the keyholder. I suspect that one reason a lot of women refuse to play the male chastity game is that they don’t want sex from a man who has to be sexually enslaved before he will use his tongue to please her.

Like most jerk off fantasies, male chastity myths are complex and strictly from the male point of view. The reality of enforced male chastity is very different. Despite the myth, it’s primarily male driven. I asked Mrs. Lion to lock me up. For a long time Mrs. Lion took her cues from me. She learned what I was looking for. I wasn’t totally satisfied because I knew that I was driving the process.

Over time, Mrs. Lion took over. She considers my suggestions, but does what she pleases. I think this is true of many couples. The secret is patience.