Getting To Be A Habit

I find it interesting that, from what I read, people approach a FLR from many directions. There are those, like ours, who appear vanilla to the outside word. You would have to know what to look for in order to know what is really going on. Then, there are the people who live out a 24/7 BDSM scene, complete with rituals, costumes, and males acting as servants.

It wouldn’t be possible for us to live in a BDSM scene. Our lives are well established in terms of sharing chores and caring for one another. If Mrs. Lion wants me to rub her feet, I will. Not because I consider that a submissive act; I don’t. It’s because she wants me to do it. Similarly, so much of what she does like putting me in panties, spanking me, even locking me in a chastity device, isn’t out of her personal kinks. She does those things because I asked her.

Here’s a little secret: Pretty much everything dominants do to or for a submissive originates with a request from the submissive. This pattern is inherent in the fabric of consensual activities. Also, if you examine the actual activities, it becomes clear that the origin had to be the submissive’s wish. Our longest standing practice is enforced male chastity. I asked Mrs. Lion to lock me up in a chastity device. She agreed.

That agreement didn’t imply a subscription to my kinky wish to have my penis locked away from my sexual access. She wasn’t worried I was going to fuck another woman. I hadn’t done it in the preceding decade. Why any sudden concern I would start then? None, of course. She did it because I wanted it. She assumed it would make me happy. My actual motives were more complex. Many of my original posts talk about them. Over time, enforced chastity wove itself into our relationship. Both of us found value in the practice. Because of that, it’s a permanent part of our lives.

No one outside of our marriage has any idea we do this. Nor do they know that Mrs. Lion is in charge and punishes me when I break a rule or fail to obey to her satisfaction. It’s our brand of FLR/domestic discipline. It works for me. Mrs. Lion is reasonably comfortable performing as my disciplining wife. She doesn’t particularly enjoy hurting me and she doesn’t care very much about the rules she enforces.

That doesn’t mean she will lose interest and the beatings will stop. She will continue and will get better and better at her role. I know she does it right now because it is something I need. I am hoping that over time, with input from others, that she will find value in it for herself. Once she does, I’m in big trouble. Like enforced chastity, I will be her disciplined husband for the rest of my life. Pretty cool!

5 Comments

  1. Author

    What are your thoughts on the idea that if your wife did what you said and put you in chastity and accepted all control over your sexual desires, and took on the leadership role of always initiating sex do you think it would be unfair to her? I’m just saying that for both male and female it’s always nice to feel wanted to have someone try to seduce you, do you ever worry that because you gave up initiating sex that your wife may feel unwanted since you don’t Persue her like you did before chastity? Or in other words do you think there were still some good things during being vanilla that you or her may miss even if you have grown closer togeather over this experience?

    1. Author

      I was never very good at initiating. Mrs. Lion’s libido has been asleep for some time. We’re working on changing that. Her loss of interest predates chastity by many years. Sometimes I think it is my fault. In any case, I am working on making it wake up.

  2. Author

    In our relationship I find male chastity/FLR/DD has all caused me to give my full attention to Goddess, as well as try to make sure every evening when I massage her I try to engage her in sex. She loves that now she can say no with out any guilt and loves me trying all the time. She feel beautiful and sexy. Being caged and denied is my Viagra.

  3. Author

    “…it becomes clear that the origin had to be the submissive’s wish.”

    While that is the case for me, and I believe for you as well, but I disagree.

    It doesn’t have to be.

    The male chastity discussions in another country, posters are primarily women with questions of “How do I convince my husband/boyfriend to wear a chastity device” and women giving advice to each other.

    The few male posters were variations of “My girlfriend/wife wants to do this to me. Never heard of it. How/why/what…”

    Culture differences I guess.

    1. Author

      I’m not sure that’s the case anywhere in the western world. In my 15 years writing and reading about this subject, I haven’t found a single credible case of the woman initiating it.

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