The Innovator

post from another blog
This is the sort of reading material I like and would love to suggest Mrs. Lion read too. (To read this post, click the image.)

Mrs. Lion tends to misunderstand why I ask her to read something I find interesting. We have very different tastes in how we spend our down time. She will spend hours on Facebook reading and viewing stuff reposted by a large number of people. That’s fine. It’s entertaining. My reading is more directed. I tend to look for material that provides information about a subject that interests me.

When I come across a blog post or article I think she might find useful, I suggest she take a look at it and I email her a link to access it. If the suggested reading material is about enforced chastity, FLR, or domestic discipline, she very reluctantly reads what I suggest. I think I understand what’s going on. She takes my suggestion to read something as a criticism of the way she is doing things. She thinks that I want to “educate” her in the way I think we should proceed. She’s half right.

I generally ask her to read things that either turn me on or seem like a fresh point of view about what we are doing. In some cases, I would like to try what we read. So, in that sense she is right. But, I never use my reading suggestions as a sideways effort to tell her she is either doing something wrong or missing something I think we need. That’s never the case. I will tell her if I think she should consider something different. In some cases after we both read something, I ask her if we could try it. But I never imply she is somehow deficient in her leadership or technique.

It seems to me that when we read something, we process the information differently, particularly when we read about others who share our power exchange. When I read a post or article, I either put myself in the writer’s shoes and try to learn how it feels to experience what I am reading, or I make mental notes because I am getting good information. Sometimes I do both. I don’t compare myself or my actions with the writer’s.

When Mrs. Lion reads the same piece, I think she compares herself with the subject of the item. Is she not spanking “correctly”? The writer is obviously much better at it than she. Or, “Does Lion want me to do that? I don’t think I can. I’m letting him down.” In fact, that never occurred to me. I probably thought it might be a good idea to try this new approach. It simply never occurs to me that she is doing something wrong.

As a result of this difference, I rarely suggest reading material to her and she never goes off to find things on her own. I think we are poorer for this. I don’t think it is reasonable for her to take on the task of “inventing” FLR and domestic discipline on her own. Though I have to admit she is doing a great job.

Reading an article doesn’t mean you have to adopt what it advocates, just consider it information that perhaps could  help us move along. I think that if somehow we could both read some of the same material, it would foster great conversations and perhaps transfer the role of innovator, from me to her.


  1. Author

    I’ve had pretty much the very same experience when sharing website with my wife.

  2. Author

    I can relate quite directly here. I read too much about different things that interest me. My wife does not think that I really need to learn about any more new kinks since I have too many for her taste already.

    She really does not have any interest in learning about and doing things that other people are up to. She is very creative and imaginative and has come up with some genuine surprises to me. I do agree with Lion that it would be productive if she were willing to take a break from Facebook and read some of what I am reading so we can communicate with each other more.

    Excellent post topic, thank you for sharing.

    1. Author

      The Journal is intended to be woman friendly. We have quite a few female readers, but I suspect that many of the women we had hoped to reach, simply don’t read sites like ours.

      1. Author

        Caged Lion, you are wrong. I am a women who has her husband caged and I read your blog. I have to admit it has helped me understand my husband and his kinky side. When I read your blogs, it sounds just like my husband and I. I was always reluctant to try FLR and still struggle with it but you and Mrs Lion have helped me so much. Thank you

        1. Author

          Thanks for your comment. You are the first woman who has come forward to say that she initiated male chastity. How did you learn of it? How did you present it and FLR to your husband? Hmmm. I sound like your husband? Are you Mrs. Lion 🙂

      2. Author

        I did not initiate it, my husband did. It took him awhile to convince me. We’ve been experimenting with this for several years, it is still a work in progress. I’m more of a loving and tender type person and so practicing FLR has been a challenge. This year has been different and reading blogs online has really opened my mind to it. Beside, I get to enjoy all the benefits!! I am really enjoying all my orgasms while he may get to only get to do it once every few months. Thank you and Mrs Lion for sharing with us.

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