By:
In: Punishment

I have a friend who is in her late 70s. She’s known for doing the unexpected. I got an email from her the other day and she said she’s been recovering from a knee injury she suffered while line dancing. Line dancing! I can imagine her doing it too. She probably leaves much younger people in the dust. I told her about Lion’s shoulder and she said she’s known many older people who’ve had the surgery. The biggest thing is to follow the physical therapy even beyond the point you feel healed, otherwise you can get into trouble. One more vote in the Lion-should-have-the-surgery column.

We continue to get ready for his surgery. We’re taking care of things that need to be done before he becomes in-valid, as he likes to pronounce it. We still have a ways to go but we’ll be ready. And, along the way, I’m finding projects that I can do while I’m home taking care of him. Those things that you wish you had time for. Well, I may actually have time for them.

Lion mentioned sex after surgery. As long as we protect his shoulder, he should be good to go. The issue, of course, is that the pain pills also make Mr. Weenie groggy. Personally, I think sex will be the last thing on his mind for at least the first week. But I never know. Like my friend, Lion is known for doing the unexpected.

The other night I remembered to spank Lion for not losing weight. He gained .8 pounds so he got 8 not-so-terrible swats. They hurt, but not as much as they should have. I took it easy on him on purpose. He’d been dreading it all day. I gained weight too so I figured I didn’t have a leg to stand on. Of course, I’m in charge so there’s that. We just need to jump back on the diet bandwagon and start exercising too. That will save Lion’s butt.

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Living with a female led relationship, Male Chastity

Saturday night Mrs. Lion gave me an orgasm. She was edging me over and over. Finally she asked,

“Do you want to come?”

[Me] “Oh, yes please!”

[Mrs. Lion] “But if I let you come tonight you won’t want to come tomorrow.” (pause) “And, if you come tomorrow, what about the next day?”

[Me] “This doesn’t sound like a good way to think of things.”

Without another word, she kept masturbating me. I went past the edge and fell over with a very nice orgasm.

While that might not have been very forward-looking of Mrs. Lion, I was grateful that she decided not to act on her train of thought. Later, after all those nice hormones wore off, I updated the “Lion’s Sex Life” widget and snuggled under the covers with my lioness.

Not surprisingly, sex after surgery has not been a concern of mine. A thoughtfully provided pamphlet advised that sex is fine as long as I protect my shoulder. Really? I will be doped up on opioids and in considerable discomfort. I’m much more concerned about whether I can sleep. Sex doesn’t even make the list.

Even now, Most of my attention is taken up alternating between wondering if I made the right decision and how can I function with just one arm. For the record, it’s my right arm. I write with my left and years ago, when allowed to jerk off, my left took care of that too. So, I’m losing my helper arm for some time.

In many ways, even considering the long, painful recuperation, this decision isn’t nearly as profound as my decision to give the key to my chastity device to Mrs. Lion. Even as I write this, I can hear you thinking that isn’t right at all. After all, I can change my mind and end the power exchange if I want. Well, no. I really can’t. Orgasm control with or without the chastity device is not mine to drop. Mrs. Lion won’t agree. I could just refuse and jerk off secretly, right? No, I can’t.

Do I mean, no I won’t? After all, my chastity device isn’t inescapable. Besides, I’m wild right now. If I unilaterally decide to end our power exchange, I will be breaching trust. Such a move will cause irreparable damage to the most important relationship of my life. Recuperation from that will be much longer than dealing with recovery from rotator cuff surgery.

It wasn’t easy to decide to ask Mrs. Lion to lock me up. But I reasoned that what I lost in sexual freedom, I would gain in restoring our physical relationship. Is not having full use of my right arm and some daily pain worth the year of painful recovery? Can I keep functioning effectively at work while dealing with this? Is the benefit worth the cost?

So far, I’ve done well with decisions like this. Male chastity and domestic discipline were risks too. I wasn’t sure I could submit on any level. I realized once we got going with enforced chastity that it would be a struggle. It was for over a year. Now, it is just part of my life. I like it.

Starting domestic discipline was easier. It took a long time before Mrs. Lion punished me severely enough to become a true deterrent to behavior she didn’t like. Once her spankings reached the needed level of severity, I wondered if I didn’t make a mistake. I decided to shut up and let things evolve. I’d like to say that I’m as comfortable with domestic discipline as I am with make chastity. I’m not.

Mrs. Lion isn’t either. I’m grateful that she isn’t totally consistent with enforcement of her rules. She sometimes lets me interrupt her with no more than a sharp growl from her. I realize that this isn’t going to last. I’ve gotten a bit of a pass due to my shoulder.

If you wonder why I want to continue with something that is difficult for me, I’ll try to explain. Unlike many/most guys who want female control and take great comfort in being disciplined, I don’t. So, for me, domestic discipline isn’t following a male-submissive world order. It’s a way to improve communication in a different way. I can’t brush off things Mrs. Lion says that I don’t like. She can’t withhold her true feelings when she is upset with me. By agreement, she’s the law in this den. She enforces it with a paddle or strap. I either learn or have a meeting with her implement of choice.

I suppose I could end this too. At this point, the damage to our relationship wouldn’t be severe.  But I don’t want to stop. No matter how much I hate being spanked, I love that Mrs. Lion is finding her voice. She is doing a wonderful job making me a better man. I don’t want that to end.

By:
In: Living with Lion

If Lion does his surgery, (he’s still trying to decide and probably will be until the day before) he will be out of commission for a while. I’ll be doing all of the heavy lifting around here. Chores that I don’t normally do will fall to me. All of the cooking, except for easy stick-it-in-the-microwave-and-push-the-button meals, will be done by me. I’m betting a lot of the meals I “cook” will be the easy microwave ones too.

Yesterday, Lion took a shower before dinner. For some reason, I was tired and I just planned to snooze until Lion was out of the shower and we’d both get dinner ready. Surprise! Next thing I knew, he was walking in the door with dinner. Oops. He said I looked so peaceful and he knows he won’t be able to do much after the surgery so he got dinner ready by himself and let me sleep. After dinner, he asked if I could take the garbage out since the remnants of the chicken we had would likely stink up the kitchen. As I was cleaning up the dishes, Lion took the garbage out. When I asked him why he said he was getting a head start on good deeds for when he can’t do them. Banking a little good will toward the time he assumes he’ll be a whining, in-pain Lion.

I told him that’s not how it works. Besides, he takes care of me when I’m sick. We take care of each other. He doesn’t have to build up any bonus points. If I ever need surgery that has a long rehab period, he’ll do the same for me. We are trying to think ahead to have things ready that can be done before the surgery, but not all things have that ability. We can’t for example, take the garbage out ahead of time. The can is empty until we create the garbage. We can’t buy all the food we’ll need for the next six months. We don’t have the storage and some of it needs to be fresh.

I appreciate everything Lion does around here. I’m sure I’ll appreciate it more when he can’t do it. But he doesn’t have to get on my good side by doing more things. He’s already on my good side. Right beside me.

By:
In: Lion's Journal, Punishment

For guys who fantasize about male chastity, one of the most popular stories is about the stern keyholder extending the time for his next orgasm due to misbehavior. It’s no secret that those of us who like the idea of wearing  a chastity device are turned on thinking that their wait for the next orgasm will be extended if they displease their keyholder. I admit that I’m turned on by that fantasy. But I know there is a huge problem with doing this in the real world.

In sexual play, temporary frustration of either partner is amazing fun. Males, in particular, love being edged. I my case, edging is over 90% of the sexual activity that I have. On most days, Mrs. Lion edges me several times and then leaves me frustrated. When I am wearing my chastity device, Mrs. Lion puts it back on as soon as I get soft. It stays in place until the next time she wants to tease me. The same routine applies if I am wild.

I like this process. I look forward to the edging sessions. It’s my fantasy come true. If Mrs. Lion then “punishes” me by withholding orgasm and teasing for a period of time, then it feeds my fantasy. It certainly isn’t a punishment.

Maybe we should consider the idea of punishment. Sexual play frequently makes use of that word. Role play includes punishing a naughty child, employee, student, etc. The punishment is some thing the “punishee” wants. Yes, it might hurt or be frustrating, but it is arousing and satisfying to both people. The bottom wants to experience the sensations and frustration.

Clearly, the word “punishment” has a very different meaning in the context of real discipline. Punishment in the classic sense, is the infliction or imposition of a penalty as retribution for an offense. The person being punished gets no pleasure from the punishment.

In our house, Mrs. Lion generally spanks me when I commit an offense. I know what you are thinking. I get turned on by spanking. Yes, in the play sense I do. The idea of a play spanking makes me hard. It’s a turn on. Punishment spanking is something I try my best to avoid. The idea might be a turn on, but the reality is pure pain. Mrs. Lion hits me hard enough to make me scream. This is true from the first swat to the last. If I started out feeling turned on, by swat number two, all I want is for her to stop. I never do anything to provoke a punishment.

Based on my description, can’t sexual punishments be real too? What if the “sentence” for an offense is an additional month of uninterrupted wear of my chastity device? Wouldn’t that go well past the point when the idea is a turn on?  It might be for me. I suppose the idea of this sort of penalty is exciting, but I don’t think the reality would be that much fun.

Continuous lockup may be self defeating. It can have one of two possible effects. The one the fantasies tout is that horniness will increase every day. It will become painful to be denied. If that’s true, then I am sure being so horny is fun. What guy doesn’t like feeling that way? The second effect is that interest in sex will drop off and whether the device is on or now will cease to matter.

This is profoundly different from punishment spanking. Long lock up may not be as much fun as the fantasy, but let’s face it, sexual arousal is not a deterrent to anything. The idea of a spanking is arousing to me. But no matter how horny I am, the actual spanking is just painful and not a bit sexual. Other classic punishments like mouth soaping, corner time, writing assignments, etc. may be arousing to think about, but very quickly become horrible.

Sexual punishment just doesn’t work as a deterrent. It’s part of the game. The real, domestic-discipline punishments are true deterrents to repeat offenses. Withholding orgasms is just part of the game. See the difference?