collar not connected message
Uh oh!

Last night we went out to dinner. After we ordered we were both looking at our phones. I happened to swipe to the page with the training collar app on it. Uh oh. Lion forgot his training collar. I asked if he forgot something. He had no idea. I showed him the phone, searching in vain for the collar. He said he meant to wear it. Oops! Trouble for Lion. Then I noticed the empty plate where pickles used to be. I told him he forgot something else and pointed out the plate. He said I rarely eat pickles so he thought he could eat them. Of course, that wasn’t the issue. I didn’t want pickles. I wanted him to ask before he ate them. He should never eat before I do unless he has permission. And he didn’t have permission. More trouble for Lion.

On the way to the restaurant, Lion suggested I use a strap to punish him. We have several. I reminded him of a long, thin piece of rubber he bought. He agreed that hurt a lot. Our spare room is a giant catch-all. Everything without a home finds a home in there. I went searching for the long rubber strop, but came up with it’s shorter, wider cousin. Both made of rubber. Both nasty. When we first got them it smelled like a tire shop in the bedroom. It took a long time for them to off gas. Now they no longer stink, but they still have their nastiness.

One hard swat was enough to make Lion scream. The second one almost launched him off the bed. I waited a few seconds for the next swats and then I discovered that one swat, right in the middle, was a good way to go. I didn’t count swats, but they were hard and nasty. When I was done, Lion said he felt welts. I only saw one, but it was dark with blood. I was sure he’d have a bruise. This morning it looks like I never touched him. Darn tough Lion hide! But I guess the bruise isn’t the most important thing. I wonder if Lion will remember his training collar when we go out later?

[Lion — It still hurts when I sit a certain way. You can read my perspective tomorrow morning.]

Lioness 2.0 is Mrs. Lion’s description of the more consistent, strict keyholder and disciplinary wife she aspired to become. As she’s described it, 2.0 emerges now and then to deal with me. Each time she’s shown up I’ve felt the effects in terms of more painful spankings and longer waits.

Of course, the manifestations of 2.0’s presence through more intense experiences for me, are only the surface trappings of the new lioness. 2.0 is much more complex. The key difference between lioness 1.0 and 2.0 is the acceptance of her role in our power exchange. When 2.0 shows up, I’m amazed at how well she reads me and provides exactly what I need (not necessarily what I want).

For example, last Monday Mrs. Lion spanked me for sexually touching myself. This is a very serious offense in our world. Her spanking hurt, but it wasn’t particularly memorable. It was fairly easy for me to take and I wasn’t sore afterward. She asked me for a review and that’s what I told her. Stupid Lion. The next punishment day was Thursday. She advised me that I had forgotten to thank her for spanking me on Monday. She got her large, wooden spoon and went to work.

This time, she got some serious yelps from me. When I started squirming away, she stopped to allow me to settle back. This went on for a while; not a very long while, but longer than Monday. Eventually she said she was done. I lay on my side for some time while watching TV. This was clearly a 2.0 spanking. I sent her an email on Friday and told her that the Thursday spanking hurt a lot more, but still didn’t feel painful enough to make me stay on my best behavior.

It wasn’t my intention to goad her into making things hurt more. Well, maybe it was. I never thought of spanking as something designed to cause me maximum pain. In the BDSM world, spanking is intended to move the spankee into a nice, endorphin high or simulate a punishment scenario. As such, the bottom determines the limit.

This isn’t true if spanking is punishment. The objective is to make the consequence of bad behavior sufficiently painful to deter future infractions. The objective isn’t abuse, but it is pain. In my case, a spanking has to be severe enough to keep me on my best behavior to avoid another. That’s it. How much pain I need t put me in the right frame of mind has yet to be determined. Also, the amount of pain should be proportionate to the offense.

Believe it or not, I never thought about punishment this way. Neither of us has much experience punishing anyone, including our kids. Live and learn. Anyway, 2.0 is cranking up the sensation. I hope she is going to continue until she gets through to me in the same way the training collar does. In a real sense, how painful a punishment is depends on how it modifies my behavior. Fair enough. It’s what we signed up to do.

Following the spanking, Mrs. Lion disappeared from the bedroom She returned about ten minutes later holding a carved piece of ginger root. She was going to fig me. I got on my knees and she worked the root into my ass. The ginger oil creates a strong sensation of heat. This piece of ginger really burned! Usually, for me at least, the sensation is very hot, but not nearly the level of the infamous Icy Hot. This was right up there. Eventually, she removed it. My anus continued to burn for some time. This was the fun kind of sensation. 2.0 decided to give me a surprise. How cool is that!

Ok, I know what you’re thinking. That crazy lion is topping from the bottom again. He’s trying to make his life more difficult. No, I’m not topping from the bottom. I’m doing what a good bottom should always do. I’m giving my top feedback so that she can make whatever adjustments she wishes based on my reactions. It may sound weird that I should provide feedback about punishment. I’m not a little cub. I’m grown up. I have the capacity to help Mrs. Lion become more effective. That means that I am encouraging her to do things I will truly regret suggesting. But this was all my idea. So I owe her the information she needs to make my wish come true.

This is not the same as me being in control in any way. If I stay silent, Mrs. Lion will need to deduce what works in terms of discipline for me. She may eventually reach the correct intensity, but getting there could cause her anxiety and worry. She doesn’t want to hurt me. She does want to be an effective disciplining wife. To avoid causing her negative feelings, I have to do two things: First, I need to provide honest feedback about how I feel she is doing. Second, I must let her know how grateful I am that she is doing this for me.

That’s my job. She doesn’t have to act on my feedback. If I tell her that punishment is too intense and she doesn’t see behavioral changes in me, she can just say “Too bad.” and dial up the pain until I make the desired change. That’s what I ultimately want. In order to get there, I have to help 2.0 get grounded in what works for me.

When I got out the paddle last night, Lion asked why he was being punished. So much for him remembering the list. I reminded him that he never thanked me for Monday night’s punishment. He had his aha moment. He really did mean to thank me, not only because it’s the rule, but also because he really means it. He’s grateful that I’m doing all these things for him and to him. I don’t remember hitting him any harder than Monday but he said the stinging lasted longer. Maybe it was the choice of paddle. I think I used one of the blood wood paddles Monday. Last night I used a wooden spoon. Good old wooden spoon. I don’t remember getting hit with one when I was little. Maybe it was just there to scare us. To this day my sister insists it was my idea to hide that wooden spoon one day. I was about 5. She was about 12. Guess whose idea I think it really was.

After my shower, I disappeared from the bedroom for a few minutes. Lion stayed where he was. I decided to peel some ginger for Lion’s ass. We haven’t done it in a long time and since he liked the anal play over the weekend, I figured he’d like some more. Several months ago we amassed quite a collection of ginger. Lion bought some every time he saw it in the store. He looked for the biggest roots. There’s a few theories for figging. Some say that it has to be fresh. Some say it has to age. Well, our bounty of ginger aged to the point that most of it was unusable. We still have an older supply, but a few weeks ago we bought more.

I’m not sure there’s any rhyme or reason to selecting the best ginger. I pulled a piece off of the newest root. It was already shaped sort of like a dildo or butt plug. I peeled the longest end and left the little hook as a handle. For whatever reason, this ginger was potent. Normally it gets hotter over time and then loses some of its oomph. Not this time. It was hot and getting hotter the longer it stayed in. I think it was in less than five minutes. Lion felt the burn for a few hours.

As the night wore on, I started feeling achier and achier. Lion asked if I was going to unlock him. I did and said we may just snuggle. But, of course, once I get my weenie in my hand I want to play with him. I edged Lion at least eight times. I got him so close to the edge I thought I went too far. When I was finally done with him, he was hornier than ever with no relief in sight. I think by this time his butt was no longer stinging and his ass was no longer hot. He told me I really know how to frustrate him. I told him to think about how good it will feel when he finally gets to come. This morning he emailed me and told me he loves the way I’m treating him. He wants to wait longer for an orgasm. I kidded him that he wasn’t going to get to come until January. Not surprisingly, he said he’s fine with that.

I guess he likes the old punishment and ginger mixed with the new attitude.

As we are completing our third year of enforced chastity, our life with it continues to mature. Over the last three years there have been times I have been allowed to run wild with no chastity device locked on me. These periods centered around vacation and business travel. There have also been times I spent a few days wild for no real reason.

Our Jail Bird has developed a sign of age. The security screw doesn’t stay tight no matter how firmly Mrs. Lion turns it. Within a day it works its way loose enough to be removed without a tool. Mrs. Lion isn’t concerned I will take advantage of this situation, but we both worry the screw could work itself out completely and get lost. Apparently this isn’t a unique problem. Mature Metal advised me that this happens and the ring needs rethreading. To get this done, we have to return the entire device, security screws, and the tool.

I prefer that I am unable to remove the cage myself. I like the loss of control. Mrs. Lion indicated that she also prefers things that way. I suggested that we might want to consider getting a “spare” Jail Bird. This is expensive. Mine costs over $400 with the security screw option. The alternative is to send the hardware back. I would then be without a cage for at least two weeks.

Over the last few weeks, my uncaged time has been drastically reduced. Mrs. Lion now understands that I like being consistently locked up. She used to unlock me for teasing and then leave me wild until after my last pee of the night. She would then lock me up before we went to sleep. I’ve been a bit uncomfortable with this. The times that she unlocked me just prior to teasing and then immediately caged me again when she was done, felt much better. So, she has had me put the ring back on and then she cages me immediately after she is finished with her weenie.

In general, as you might have noticed, she has become more possessive of her weenie. I was punished for trying to help her get me hard. I appreciate this greatly. She has been growing stricter and more consistent in other areas as well. Is this 2.0 finally taking over? I hope so.

I travel to the East Coast about once a month since I started my new job. I am allowed to be wild for my travels. The Jail Bird would certainly set off the TSA metal detectors. We both agreed that self locking made little sense. I do enjoy the freedom and comfort of being a free-range lion. Can I reconcile this with my increased sense of security when I am more strictly locked at home?

I would like to think so. I did order a new, very different plastic device. It would pass airport security easily. If it is comfortable, Mrs. Lion could keep me caged when I travel as well. I’m not sure I would like that. Six hour flights are barely tolerable now. Any chastity device would add to the discomfort.

I’m not caged to prevent unauthorized sexual activity. The main reason I am locked up is that the cage provides a very practical symbol of our power exchange. Neither of us consider it a kinky sex toy at this point. The chastity device has a significant purpose in our relationship. it forces both of us to maintain a sexual power balance that has restored intimacy for us. Neither of us can forget the cage is locked on my genitals.

So, if I am wild when i travel perhaps that reminder isn’t as necessary as it is when we are together. I just don’t know. I do know that I am very happy when Mrs. Lion makes a point of keeping me locked as much of the time as possible and reminds me of her power.

Whether or not I am wild when traveling isn’t really the issue now. I think that what counts the most is that I am always under direct supervision or locked up when we are in the same geographical area. Is it worth $400 to guarantee that there won’t be any interruption?