Lion had a very eventful day yesterday. I put him in the sling and proceeded to give him some anal attention. It’s been a while so I took it slow. Just my fingers at first, and then I used a small butt plug. While the butt plug was in I started jerking him off. Not all the way, of course. Just enough to tease him. When I was done with the butt plug, I started spanking him.

Let me just say, it’s been a long time since he’s had a play spanking. I started with my hands. I stopped periodically to keep Mr. Weenie interested. By the time I got his cheeks rosy, I was stopping not only to keep Mr. Weenie interested, but also to give my hands a rest. They were stinging too. I also used a light wooden spoon, but I wanted to use my hands mostly so I could gauge how far I was going. Between the butt plug, spanking and edging, I’d say Lion had a pretty good time. I locked him up and that was that. Or so I thought.

About an hour before we went to bed, Lion said I needed to start conditioning him to do things. He’d read a blog earlier that outlined how to get your husband to make it a habit to do the dishes. He said I should use that technique on him for whatever I wanted. But now, just as bedtime rolled around, he was on it again. And on and on it. I should have realized his sleeping pill was kicking in, but it wasn’t until I saw him swaying in the bathroom that I realized it. Then when I went to brush my teeth, he pinched my nipples. I told him he better watch himself or he’d get punished. He was undeterred.

The only other time he pinched my nipple was as he was falling asleep a very long time ago. He never pays much attention to my breasts at all. I guess the sleeping pills were working their magic because he kept telling me he loved my breasts and didn’t usually touch them because I intimidate him. Yeah, OK. Then he decided I needed an orgasm. So at 11-something at night, he’s working on an orgasm for me. And falls asleep. When he woke up five minutes later he insisted he hadn’t been sleeping and went right back to work. He did manage to give me a few orgasms and then I had to convince him I was done.

I figured he’d fall asleep, but he rolled to his side of the bed and started whimpering that he wanted an orgasm. I reminded him that he’d had his fun in the afternoon. He kept whining. Finally I unlocked him and played with him for a bit. It was obvious he wasn’t going to get hard. I assumed that from the beginning. It just took a while for it to sink into Lion’s sleeping pill-laden mind. I locked him back up and he was ready for sleep.

I have no idea if he remembers any of this. I’ve heard of sleep walking and sleep driving. I wonder if there’s ever been a documented case of sleep sex.

A lot of what Mrs. Lion writes is about what I want and don’t want. It’s true she’s writing about things that happen to me. She likes to hear my reactions to what she does. But am I the customer who has to be pleased?

Most recently, she has been writing about my reaction to her decision to give me orgasms every three or four days. I do react with some surprise. Our general pattern is that I come every seven to ten days. The last four orgasms have been at three or four day intervals. I’m not complaining. I enjoy getting a chance to ejaculate. I’m just a bit surprised.

Mrs. Lion has made it clear that my opinion matters. I suppose that’s natural. Since I’m getting the orgasms (and beatings), does that mean I need to be satisfied? It would if I am the intended “customer”. Of course, I’m not. The only person who needs to be pleased is Mrs. Lion.  I ejaculate at her pleasure, not mine. If she decides to make me come every day or two, that is her choice. I’m still in enforced chastity. The decision is absolutely hers, not mine.

I’ve been a somewhat critical customer of Mrs. Lion’s services. That is very silly of me. Do I ask my dog if she likes the grooming I had her get? Absolutely not. Should I review the quality of a punishment Mrs. Lion administers? Well, no. In fact, if the roles were reversed, I would respond to a review that it wasn’t harsh enough by trying again to get it “better”. That would cure complaints quickly.

The fact is that I don’t have to review an orgasm or punishment. It doesn’t matter how I feel about either. I am grateful that Mrs. Lion takes the time and trouble to do anything for me. I have way too many opinions, I think. When will I learn to lie back and enjoy it?

Why is it that when you’re at work, a day lasts so long, but when you have a four-day weekend, it’s over in the blink of an eye? I had plans. (Actually my plan was to sleep until Saturday, which I pretty much did.) We were going to play and have fun. We’re still planning to play, but how did it get to be Sunday already?

Last night I did manage to tie Lion’s hands to the bed and then I brought out the menthol rub. I’ve been passing that little jar of blue fire for over a week, thinking I should slather it on Lion’s balls. Well, I finally got there. I only did a little dab though. Last time I slathered it. Lion was in a lot of pain. Too much blue fire, even though he poked fun at it being only 5% menthol. That may be the last time he says anything about a menthol rub. This morning, however, he told me I can be a little more liberal with it. Aside from remembering last time, Lion also had a few sore spots from manscaping. I didn’t want to take a chance to get the menthol in those areas. Next time, though, watch out!

My plan for play today is to get Lion in the sling. He hasn’t been in it for a very long time. Once he’s in it, I’m not too sure what to do with him. I can certainly use some more menthol on him; but I just did that. Two other options are anal play and spanking. He hasn’t had either in a while. I’m talking about play spanking. Of course, I can do both this afternoon. He won’t be able to take much anal play right away. We can start out with my fingers and some small dildos. It will take some time to build up to larger dildos and butt plugs.

I think Lion will be happy with a play spanking. It’s definitely different from a punishment spanking; for both of us. I have to be sure to start slowly and build up. I can use my hands at first. I can’t do that with a punishment spanking which needs to be fairly severe right off the bat. My hands would hurt worse than his butt. I think that may be the case even with a play spanking. My hands are stinging and Lion is just smiling away with a red butt. Of course, Lion has a tough butt; except, it seems, when he’s receiving a punishment spanking. Then I think sometimes he can be classified as a wimp.

Sometimes I don’t think I am very bright. Here I am on this blog having written over 1,000 posts and the light bulb finally goes on. I finally get it.

Let me back up a bit. Last night we went out to dinner and then spent a few hours playing the slots at a local casino. This time I remembered to put on the training collar. This is the longest I’ve worn it. Mrs. Lion didn’t zap me once. We joked that she could use it to find me if we were separated in the casino. She could follow the yelps.

Anyway, I noticed that I was watching her carefully to be sure I didn’t eat first or interrupt her. I asked her if I behaved better when wearing the training collar. She told me that I am always on my best behavior when I have it on.

Ah ha!

When she zaps me with the training collar, I am always surprised, even if I know it’s coming. As a correction it is close to perfect. I really want to avoid it. During dinner Mrs. Lion had her phone on the table with the training collar app open. I got the point. It’s not that I am afraid of being zapped. I just don’t like it one bit. The best way to avoid a zap is to be on my best behavior. My memory of the right things to do seems to be perfect when that collar is around my balls.

The big ah ha has nothing to do with the collar per se. It’s about the entire point of domestic discipline. I’m turned on by the idea of being spanked. Even though I don’t like a punishment spanking, the idea is arousing. I understand that a lot of guys feel this way. I also find the idea of wearing the training collar hot too. I like the idea that I have to wear it. I also like that I get spanked. Then why does wearing the collar act as a true deterrent and a spanking doesn’t?

There are a few differences between the corrections. The collar is immediate and often public. I have absolutely no control over it. Cooperation isn’t needed. All Mrs. Lion has to do is touch the button on her app. She doesn’t have to be physically near me (within 30 feet or so). Spanking, on the other hand, requires me to bare my butt and lie on the bed. I know what is coming and my feedback can often reduce the severity of the punishment.

I’ve been doing research on the Net about domestic discipline. I’ve been corresponding with a woman who disciplines her husband. Between her blog and our email exchange, I’ve gotten a lot of insights on a mature, domestic discipline relationship. Between that new information and what the training collar has taught me, I think I understand a lot more.

I think it’s fair for me to say that my speakings to date are for my benefit. By that I mean Mrs. Lion spanks me because it is something I want her to do. Also, she is getting experience in her role as my disciplining wife. I never considered how to tell if a punishment is effective. I don’t think Mrs. Lion gave it much thought either. Thanks to the training collar, I now get it.

A spanking, or any punishment for that matter, is effective if my behavior changes so I can avoid another. That is the only measurable result. Mrs. Lion can clearly observe whether I am on my best behavior or not.  If I’m not, I must not be too concerned about the consequences. Seems like a reasonable way to judge effectiveness. If my behavior doesn’t change for the better, correction is required. The intensity of the correction really has nothing to do with how I feel about it. Apparently my behavior changes without any need for me to think about the consequences.

In psychological terms this makes a lot of sense. I am conditioned by the adverse stimului to avoid behaviors that will get me more. The training collar is a very effective way to administer adverse stimulus. Spanking is too. Much of my reading on disciplinary spankings give suggestions on how to tell the punishment is effective. Signs like sweating, tears, and passive acceptance are all valid indications that the stimulation is intense.

What isn’t clear is when I have received enough. That can only be judged by my subsequent behavior. If I am on my best behavior for a few hours after the punishment and then revert to my “forgetful” self, there is a need for a stronger reminder. If only a few swats that barely make my butt pink cause me to be on my best for days, then that is enough.

The main reason for punishment is conditioning. It isn’t fear of another punishment that is the motivator. I’m not afraid of the training collar. It’s just a very effective source of correction. So effective, that just wearing it is enough to change my behavior. That effect will wear off after a while. But a few strong zaps will refresh my subconscious and my behavior will immediately improve.

It’s exactly the same with spanking. After some period of time, the conditioning will start to wear off. Another spanking will renew my memory. What’s so surprising to me is that these changes aren’t conscious at all. I am not thinking, “Uh oh. I better watch out or I will get punished.”

It’s nothing like that. I just want to do what Mrs. Lion wants. Go figure. I never believed the accounts I’ve read about guys changing just because they have to wear a chastity device. Or stories of a strong spanking making a real change in a guy. I attributed the changes to fear of another spanking. That’s not the point at all.

Domestic discipline isn’t about horrid beatings. That’s the fantasy. It’s no different than the fantasies about being locked in a chastity device for life. Hot fantasies tend to be extreme. My enforced chastity includes lots of orgasms. But I know they are strictly at Mrs. Lion’s pleasure. I’ve learned to be fine with that. My punishments are supposed to hurt, but they aren’t administered to satisfy some inner need of mine or some sadistic fun for Mrs. Lion. They have a real purpose.

I now understand how things are supposed to work. I see that there are objective measures to determine if a punishment is intense enough. There is also an objective way to know when another is needed. I don’t think either of us considered this information as particularly useful. Now I get it.

Even though I understand how all this works, I realize that my changes aren’t conscious. Yes, I can watch my step to avoid a punishment. But that sort of attention doesn’t last very long. The subconscious conditioning is the real benefit. The act of putting on the training collar triggers a positive response in me. I wonder if some physical sign that reminds me of being spanked would have the same beneficial effect. I also wonder if Mrs. Lion agrees with my latest revelation. Stay tuned.