I often share things here that I haven’t told Lion yet. Of course, he usually reads my posts before they publish so technically he knows before you do, but I think Lion might be particularly excited about this secret. Last night, as I was falling asleep, I was thinking about my idea of jumpstarting my libido and I did feel some twinges of horniness. I’m not sure they were enough to act on, but they were there. And Lion was quietly snoring next to me so there wasn’t really any possibility of acting on it anyway. (Lion just did a victory lap around his office, I bet.)
The thing is, I think I’m letting life get to me too much. We’ve been getting home later and dinner has been later and everything has been pushed later and later. By the time we get to snuggling or edging or whatever, I’m done for the day. It’s not that I’m tired necessarily. I still have the energy to play with Lion. I just don’t think I have the energy to have my own orgasm. Now, you might be thinking that’s ridiculous. All you have to do (I hate that saying) is lay back and enjoy it. Lion will do all the work. Yes, from a physical standpoint that’s true. But sex is mostly mental. There are days I’m mentally fried long before my workday is over. And that, I think, is the bulk of the problem.
So how do we fix it? I had a doctor tell me once that all I needed to do was lower my stress level. When I launched into a tirade of all the things that were stressing me out, he looked shocked and shut up quickly. It’s not like you can flip a switch and be magically stress free. The old commercial “Calgon, take me away” doesn’t really work. Some people have a drink to relax. Some people read. I tend to play mindless games on my iPad. But there’s always a list of things I didn’t do or need to do.
Morale at work is at a low, despite the prankster duo (a coworker and I) hiding fake body parts and spiders to scare people leading up to Halloween. Lately we’ve been hiring people off the street who have no idea what they’re doing and it really shows. It’s like hiring someone off the street to be a doctor because they have a body so they should know how it works, or a mechanic because they can drive a car so they should be able to fix it. It’s frustrating to those of us who actually know what we’re doing. And it’s hard to leave that frustration at work.
My first thought is to banish the television in the bedroom. Obviously we’d still have it in there. I mean banish the watching of television in the bedroom until we are done with any festivities. This might work to get Lion’s fun out of the way first. I still have a problem with being the center of attention. It’s been all about Lion for so long, how do I get my mind wrapped around having fun for me? How do I shut my mind off to the stresses of work or life in general?
This is why I say the problem is me and not Lion. He’s more than willing to do anything I want him to do to give me orgasms. I’m trying to be willing. I just need to get my head in the game.