I’ve been writing about our FLR and domestic discipline. Other than, “Good post.” Mrs. Lion hasn’t commented. I wonder if this aspect of our FLR is still unresolved in her mind. The idea of punishment is still uncomfortable for me, and I believe, Mrs. Lion as well. Punishment is at the heart of domestic discipline. It is a physical manifestation of control. Neither of us grew up in families where punishment was a notable part of growing up. Neither of us did much punishing when we had young kids in the house. We preferred more positive feedback.
So here we are in a relationship where we have agreed to incorporate domestic discipline. That means there will be corporeal punishment for my misbehavior. The entire idea of punishment for an adult member of a couple is difficult to accept. It’s one thing to agree in principle that one partner is in charge and has the power to enforce rules. It’s quite another to actually punish your husband.
To date, Mrs. Lion’s approach has been to spank me for breaking some fairly trivial rules like eating before she starts, spilling food on my shirt, and not thanking Her for spanking me. She has one meaningful rule: I am not to interrupt her. Most of the time, when I break that one she doesn’t punish me. Our current domestic discipline is mostly about spanking for minor things; a sort of BDSM exercise.
I think that’s not a bad way to get started. It avoids the more uncomfortable issue of punishment for adult infractions. It also avoids defining just what those infractions might be. I don’t think we will ever get to many serious rules. I may be wrong, but other than unauthorized spending, I can’t think of any that would apply to me. However, there is a very big area that Mrs. Lion could use domestic discipline to resolve: annoying or displeasing her. I think that meaningful spankings for annoying her would go a long way to make me more thoughtful and her more aware of her own wants and needs.
How do you discipline someone that likes the punishment? How is that dicipline? My sub likes punishment… I need suggestions on how to enforce rules that will make him behave.
It is kind of hard to get one’s head around the idea of real, painful physical punishments of the type you describe for trivial offenses.
It seems your theory is that it is an unpleasant ritual that enhances or achieves the overall dynamic you desire (e.g., feeling her power and concretely manifesting her authority), but since it is so painful and unpleasant (and probably somewhat anxiety provoking), it does make one question whether it is ultimately necessary and worth it.
I’ve read what you’ve said about it, but I can’t say I can really get it, but you both seem committed to it, so I guess you’re getting what you want out of it.
Most of my wife’s rules are to stop my behaviours or actions that annoy her. It does seem to work!
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