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In: 2.0

My Lion wasn’t up for playing again last night. We snuggled again instead. I don’t think it’s a big deal. It’s just a break in the action. Lion thinks he’s broken again. I know I can’t tell him to snap out of it. Things don’t usually work that way. Besides that, he doesn’t pressure me for not wanting sex. What good would it do? It would just lead to bad feelings and that certainly wouldn’t snap me out of it. So what’s the answer?

It may not be the answer, but I just make sure I’m here for Lion. I’ll unlock him every night and see if he’s responsive. The other night I brought out the bag of tricks and a collection of clothespins. Four or five clothespins in, it was obvious Lion wasn’t going to have any fun. I took the clothespins off and we snuggled. Last night I didn’t try any toys. I unlocked him and gave it the old college try and then we snuggled. From my perspective, the best thing I can do for him is be there. He needs to know I’m available to play if he wants to play, but there’s no pressure.

On the other hand, the rules still apply. He still has to be naked and collared. He still shouldn’t interrupt me. Last night he got swats for interrupting me over the weekend and the make-up swats I forgot to give him last week. He reminded me at dinner that it was punishment night. Normally he does it during our email exchanges, but he has until 8:30 pm. He cut it a little close, but he complied with the rule. He needs to know 2.0 is still watching. She may not be doing evil things to him at the moment, but she is watching for swatting opportunities. Her primary goal is a safe and happy Lion. Torturing him when he wants it (even if he may not want it at the time) is fine. Hitting a Lion when he’s down is not. But the rules must be obeyed.

By:
In: Lion's Journal

One of the more difficult things to reconcile when writing this blog is that Mrs. Lion and I use it to capture our activities in enforced chastity and our brand of female led relationship. That means the picture we present isn’t particularly pure in reference to any specific power exchange. As Mark pointed out in a comment the other day,

“In our case, for example, we very much enjoy the chastity play, but we’re emphatically not a FLR, nor do I think we ever would be – neither of us wants that. Conversely, I’m sure that there are other couples – in fact I’ve met several – that are already firmly female-dominant, and I’m sure that male chastity would be a terrific addition for them. Hearing from others with their own particular slant would be good thing.”

Mark makes a valid point. Just because Mrs. Lion and I are practicing both enforced male chastity and FLR doesn’t mean that you can only get value out of our blog if you also do both.

If you’ve explored this site you have seen that we have pages that contain articles on various aspects of both male chastity and female led relationships. Those “static” pages are my way of providing information devoted to a single interest.

What we do now is the result of years of experimentation. We (I, mostly) read and imagine. Then a suggestion is made and after discussion, we try it. If it works, we add it to our repertoire. After a while, if it keeps working, it becomes part of our lifestyle. That’s what happened with male chastity and later, with FLR. Our posts document our experiments, successes and failures.

It’s unreasonable to expect someone new to us to go back and read every post we’ve written to date. That would take a very long time. I have to say that every day at least ten people spend more than 16 hours on this site, presumably reading lots of posts. That brings me back to Mark’s comment. He recognizes that Mrs. Lion and I are writing about our particular, sexual power exchanges. It makes no sense to separate them editorially.

Of course there may be no need to separate them. Could our enforced chastity work successfully if we didn’t also include wider power exchange? Or, more likely, could we just practice male chastity without anything else and stay with it permanently? Is the real essence of my enforced chastity the stuff that Mrs. Lion does in that half hour I am unlocked?

I think that the suspense and delayed sexual gratification are what I like most about being locked in a chastity device. The activities that keep me in suspense have, in turn, created an atmosphere of increased physical intimacy in our marriage. It’s true; we could have left it right there: me locked up and teased every night with an orgasm thrown in every now and then. To Mark’s point, that is a perfectly reasonable male chastity life style.

We didn’t leave it there. That’s my fault. I like the feeling of being controlled by my lioness, so we expanded the power exchange further. The benefits this time turned out to be non-sexual. Mrs. Lion is “learning” to tell me how she feels about things I do. She disciplines me as needed (Domestic Discipline, yet another kink in our mixed bag). She is also making more decisions for us. I love this change.

One thing I would like to make clear: All of these practices (FLR, enforced chastity, Domestic Discipline) are not strictly defined. They are just labels that you can apply any way you want. We aren’t the poster lions for each of these things. We do what works for us. We apply the labels as a convenience, not as the name of a particular set of activities. We dine from the power exchange menu al la carte.

By:
In: Mrs Lion Comments

As I mentioned, we went out Saturday and by the time we got home we were both tired. We watched some TV and went to sleep. Sunday was catch-up-with-everything day. We got a decent amount accomplished around the house. I didn’t get any manscaping done. Nor did I play with Lion as I had anticipated. When I finally unlocked him last night he was less than interested. I mentioned I hadn’t heard a Lion weather report all day and he said he wasn’t very horny. We decided that snuggling was just as good.

I gave Lion a surprise orgasm on Friday night. It stands to reason he wouldn’t have been interested Saturday night. I suppose not being interested last night is not unusual either. Saturday could have been his day off and Sunday could have been an off day. Neither is worth worrying about. By tonight Lion will probably be interested again. If not, I will try a little harder to change his mind. The main thing is, it’s not a big deal if he needs a few days off. Things run in cycles. Lion may go a few months being horny every night, even the night after an orgasm. Then he might go a week or two not being very horny at all. He always apologizes for it. I think it’s normal.

From time to time in the earth’s history, there have been ice ages. Then things warm up again and we have whatever the opposite of an ice age is. Global warming is changing that cycle. If Lion is just in an ice age (hopefully not a long one) then it’s not anything to worry about. If global warming is affecting him then we have to figure out a way past it. Maybe that’s a bad analogy. If it’s a normal cycle, we’re fine. If there’s something else at work, then we need to work together to get past it. One thing is for sure, I’m not giving up on him. I will pester him every night to see if he’s horny. He may get sick of me, but I won’t stop. I know there’s a horny Lion in there somewhere.

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal

We may have reached a new level in our power exchange. I’m not really sure that it is. Maybe you can help me make sense of this latest change. For the first time, Mrs. Lion is consistently informing me when I have done something wrong. Yesterday, when I was making pancakes for breakfast, I interrupted Mrs. Lion. At one point, she just said,

“That’s the second time.”

That was all. A little later at breakfast,

“You interrupted me before.”

“I did?”

“Yes.”

That’s it. After breakfast she went downstairs to her office to write her post. I was expecting that once the breakfast dishes were out of the way that she would spank me. She didn’t. She also didn’t punish me after writing her post about how I self reported my failure to put on my collar.

My initial reaction was that we were backsliding. But then a lightbulb, dim but unmistakable, came on in my head. Is this the next phase of internalizing our wider power exchange? Let me explain. Up until now when I broke a rule and Mrs. Lion noticed, she would smile and say,

“Uh oh.”

This good humored response, in my opinion, represented a conscious-somewhat-embarrassed effort to enforce her rules. The statement would generally be followed by a penny in the punishment bank. It was a bit artificial but it represented enforcement of our power exchange. I expected this phase to go on for some time. Mrs. Lion is not accustomed to  authority and enforcement of her will. She was working on her new role.

Yesterday it was very different. Her matter-of-fact statement of my infraction had no artifice. It was a genuine observation of my infraction. This is very significant. To me it meant that this was no longer a game or training exercise. It is starting to become a normal part of our relationship.

OK, the spanking didn’t follow. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Step one has to be observation of an infraction. The next step is punishment. I don’t think I have to wait long for that. On Saturday Mrs. Lion was transferring her stuff into a new handbag. She pulled her “hairbrush” paddle from her old purse and held it up.

“See where I’m Putting it?”

she asked as she put the paddle into her new purse. Later, we went off to the casino. We ate dinner there. During dinner, the conversation drifted to her new purse and the paddle that has a home there. I said,

“I don’t think you will really use that when we are out. Remember how you felt when you spanked me in the supermarket family bathroom.”

She replied,

“I may surprise you.”

She said it with a small smile. This doesn’t mean that change is imminent. In the past, statements like this didn’t mean something was going to happen the next day. I has meant that she is actively considering what she mentioned. In the past, the subject has ended on that statement only to be resurrected months later.

I’m not sure that conversational mention of my infractions means that our power exchange is at the next level. The fact that nothing followed those mentions may mean that this is just an extremely small baby step. Or, it could mean that the paddle isn’t far behind. Either way I think that domestic discipline is on its way to being a permanent part of our marriage.