If you’ve been reading along, you know that we’ve hit a sort of road block lately. Lion thought he wanted play every night. I thought I was giving him what he wanted. He told me he was tired of CBT, which I was relying on far too much. Then he said maybe he didn’t really want to play every night. In the middle of it all, he had a sore on his penis which halted play anyway. In addition, my idea of rescheduling a missed orgasm for whenever he seemed horny enough wasn’t what he wanted. He’d rather I make him wait until the next scheduled date. I figured I shouldn’t punish him for missing a date if it wasn’t his fault. And I wasn’t just waiting for him to want it again anyway. I was waiting until he proved he was horny enough for it. Yesterday he said he was glad I decided to make him wait until the 11th instead of just giving him an orgasm whenever. I told him I didn’t think I’d ever understand him. He says he’s easy to understand. He just wants to feel my control.
I think it was in December when he missed a scheduled date and I said he could have his orgasm when he showed me a beautiful penis. I wanted his hardest erection with the nice curve and very tight head. I wanted him to be very horny. I would decide if he deserved an orgasm based on just how horny he was. For a night or two he wasn’t horny enough to warrant that orgasm. I’m unclear why teasing him and then telling him he hasn’t met the standards is not control. Certainly it’s not the same thing as extending his wait, but getting him close but no cigar seems controlling to me. A standard was set. He missed it. Control. No?
This weekend, when we’re home, Lion will be in diapers. He does not have to sleep in them and he does not have to wear them when he’s dressed. He has to sit in a wet diaper for an hour before he can change it and he has to inform me when he’s wet and when he changes it. Failure to inform me will result in punishment. What kind of punishment? He may have to sit in the wet diaper longer. Or he may find himself with pink toenails. Or frilly panties. There are many possibilities. I don’t think he wants to find out. How’s that for control, my pet?