As Lion said, as I’ve said more than once, I’m not a very social person. It takes me forever to get comfortable with people. I’m not a girly girl. I’m not rough and tumble enough anymore to be a tomboy. I don’t care about fashion. I don’t care about drinking. I don’t fit in. I am extremely uncomfortable in social situations. Lion is not all that social either but he can fake it better than I can, especially when he’s interested in a specific topic. When he says it would be fun to have a weekend of parties and workshops, the first thing I think of is where I can hide. The second thing is that I’ll help set up and then I’ll stay right over here in the corner. But I know I’d be right there beside Lion, doing my best to fit in.
So all that pretty much leaves me out on my own when it comes to figuring things out. I can ask questions, but ultimately it all boils down to doing what works best for us. Trial and error I can do. Brute force is sort of my middle name. Try and try again and again and again. We’ve been fairly successful as long as we give things enough of a chance to work or make a change when we realize it’s not working a particular way. Then it just falls to me to be consistent. Another of my shortcomings. (Why does Lion put up with me?)
I see no problem trying things Lion wants to try. He’s not topping from the bottom if I decide we can try it. He obviously gives this a lot more thought than I do. I have my random bursts of ideas like Velcro and the tiny clothes pins, but for the most part, it’s all him. And I’m fine with that. I’m not sure he’s fine with that. He always worries he’s pushing me into things. If it’s something I really don’t want to do, we don’t do it. It’s not like I can’t say no.
Last night we were talking about the old days, when I was first learning to top him. As I was lightly swatting his balls I told him in the past he said I could hit harder than I was last night. He said he was younger then. I said he was just out of practice and I’d get those old balls back into shape. I was only hitting him as hard as I did the first time I spanked him, which was pathetic. I’m surprised he felt it at all. It’s a wonder he wanted to continue seeing me. He said he was grateful I even tried and look at me now. I guess you can teach an old lioness new tricks. I bet sometimes now he’s sorry he encouraged me to hit so hard. Poor Lion butt. [Lion – I am still grateful and very happy to have found Mrs. Lion]