By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Mrs Lion Comments

I’m not the only one who forgets things. Lion also forgets. He said I have never told him not to buy things around his birthday. Not true. I do it when I find an idea that he might come across and buy because, in the past, he just bought whatever he wanted. Yesterday I had something pop up online that I knew was perfect for Lion. I also know that if it popped up for me online, chances are it will pop up for him. I didn’t want him to buy the same thing. So, as I have in the past, I instituted a moratorium on his buying anything that isn’t a necessity. I don’t do it often, which is why he doesn’t remember it. It has nothing to do with taking charge. It has everything to do with frustration at his buying what he wants.

There are some things, like the racing number I got for his car when he was learning to race and the personalized street sign, I knew he’d never buy. I had to go out of my way to get those. When I got him his GoPro, I was positive he was going to buy one for himself. That, and the fact that I intended for him to use it while he was racing, was why I gave him his birthday present long before his birthday one year. And there are certain things you just don’t need more than one of. I gave him the example of a razor or drill because I couldn’t very well say, “Oh, by the way, don’t buy X in the near future because it would really wreck the surprise I have for your birthday.” And if I told him not to buy anything, he’d say he’s hungry but can’t buy lunch because I told him not to buy anything. Literal Lion that he is sometimes. So I left it vague. If he needs it to survive, he can buy it.

Poor Lion has to make it a whole week to get his next orgasm and to find out what his present and birthday dinner are. I know he’ll love all three. It’s not often that I get to pat myself on the back for finding the perfect present and the perfect dinner. Doing it for someone who will appreciate it as much as Lion will is icing on the cake.

By:
In: Female led relationship with discipline, Lion's Journal

Mrs. Lion reported Thursday night’s bonus orgasm in great detail yesterday. She took me completely by surprise. I had no idea that was coming. I was sure I would be waiting eight more days. I’m not complaining, mind you, I was at my peak horniness. The fifth day is usually when I peak. Yesterday, I got an email from Mrs. Lion warning me not to buy myself anything until after my birthday. I wonder what she thought of as a present. I can’t think of anything I want right now. We’ve both been working very hard not to spend any money for so long, it feels odd to consider buying anything for myself. This will be my second birthday wearing a chastity device.

Tonight we are going to the movies again. I asked Mrs. Lion if we could see “The Martian”. She agreed and we will see it in 3D to boot. I know she isn’t overly fond of 3D, or for that matter, going to the movies. I appreciate that she is willing to do this for me. She also let me know that the idea of putting me on an allowance is still on the table. I’m not any fonder of that idea than I was when she first proposed it. Whether or not she decides to do it, she seems to be taking her increased power to heart. With her, it comes in small ways, but her note about spending on myself is brand new. I realize she probably was thinking only of my penchant to buy things I want and then leaving her bereft of opportunities to give me a gift. However, I know she would have never written,

“You should start wondering what’s happening for your birthday too. Speaking of which, you’re not allowed to buy anything for yourself till then. No gift type things. No drills or razors or anything other than the necessities.”

Yes, my lioness, I am not saying this little note means you have adopted FLM full speed. I am saying that authority is creeping in slowly but surely.

I’ve been thinking a great deal about my request for FLM. I am not submissive by nature and I am sure if I had to accept a submissive role as the FLM fantasies define it, I would go nuts and stage a rebellion. The big question in my mind was whether we would manage to do it at all. Now, it looks like it’s going to happen whether I want it or not. Like enforced chastity, we will have our own brand of FLM. It’s unclear, of course, what we will end up doing, but financial changes are in the wind. I think that I will have to ask permission to spend more than a certain amount if it isn’t for household bills. Mrs. Lion referred to my checking account as the “house account”. Was that intentional? I don’t know. It makes sense. I pay almost all of our bills out of that account. FLM has given Mrs. Lion a good way to get more involved in our family finances.

One thing I am sure won’t change much is how we make decisions about what to do for fun or eat. She hates it when I ask her to decide where to go out to eat or what to do on a weekend. She does come up with stuff, but really hates it when I say, “You decide.” I don’t believe FLM means that the wife has to make every decision. She has final approval. It’s too soon to say how things will shake out. Stay tuned for the next episode of “Life With The Lions”.

 

By:
In: Edging, Punishment, Sex

That’s what I said to Lion last night, moments after I gave him an impromptu orgasm. He didn’t expect it. It wasn’t planned. I was about to tell him he still had eight more days to wait and then I decided to keep going. When he asked why I did it, I didn’t have an answer for him. I felt like it. Because I can. It seemed like the thing to do at the time. All of the above.

The thing is, he thinks I give him bonus orgasms because he needs them. Not true at all. Sometimes I need to taste him. Sometimes his cock is so hard and straining and, yes, beautiful, that I give him one. Sometimes I just do it for no reason. I knew he’d been very horny for a few days. There was nothing exceptional about last night. He didn’t seem super horny. He didn’t seem like a breeze would make him come anyway. He did nothing to sway me. There was no reason for me to give him an orgasm. There was no reason for me not to give him an orgasm.

We started off the night with a few punishment swats because he dropped ice cubes. Not a big infraction, but I think he really wanted some punishment. I’m not saying he dropped them on purpose. But I think he mentioned it to me because he wanted to be punished. I was standing right there and saw the whole thing. I could have told him he earned punishment. When I didn’t I think he told me so that I would enforce the rule. No skin off my nose. I’ll whack him if he wants to be whacked.

After his punishment I brought out the Velcro. He hates this stuff. I only wrapped one piece around his soft cock and once it was hard I took it off. The Velcro restricts the penis and then once it is released it sends a not-so-wonderful rush of blood. He told me last night that one piece is worse than when I wrap his whole cock. I’m not sure I understand why because it still all boils down to that first piece being tight and then letting go.

When I was done with the Velcro I tied his balls tightly. As I stroke him his balls bounce up and down. Having anything tied up turns him on. There he was, red balls peeking out from the rope, bouncing up and down as he gets closer and closer to the edge. Heaven for a Lion. I did untie him before I let him come. And I tickled his balls. That used to mean I’m about to let him come, but I do it when I’m just edging him too. This time, however, it was to send him over the edge. And over the edge he went.

I love to make my Lion come.

By:
In: Keyholder, Keyholder101, Lion's Journal, Male Chastity

Mrs. Lion didn’t get into enforced chastity and FLM with an instruction manual on how to be dominant. Of course there are tons of web sites just chock full of what a keyholder should do. Very little of that information is even remotely close to the truth. Mrs. Lion has been taking her cues from me. This has been pretty successful to date. However, the idea was only to give her a starting point and not a road map on how to tame her lion. Clearly, if I establish how she as my keyholder and disciplining wife should dominate me, I’m a behind-the-scenes top. She, of course, knows this. The problem is that patterns have been established that may be hard to change.

For example, she takes cues from me on when I get to come. If I am particularly horny and ask nicely, I am very likely to get an orgasm whether or not it is my release date. Of course Mrs. Lion is always free to give me a bonus orgasm. But should my need be a factor? I don’t think so. It should come from her. (Changing into my teaching hat) For training purposes I would think that bonus orgasms should be a reward. (back to my role as disciplined husband / caged male) I would hope that my need or lack of it would not be a factor. The same is true of teasing. Just because I am not in the mood, should that stop her? I don’t think so.

The point is that, at least until the patterns are firmly established in her mind, decisions regarding sexual activities for me should be independent of my interest or lack of it. This is very difficult for any top. One of the most difficult things for me to learn when I was a top was to divorce my actions from what my bottom wants. That doesn’t mean I expect Mrs. Lion to be totally blind to my needs and wants. She is my wife and loves me. She could never do that. But as my keyholder and disciplining wife, she needs to learn to be arbitrary and in sexual matters at least, ignore my needs. This is way harder to do than it seems. The purpose of this suggestion is to shift her thinking about sex away from me an toward her.

This is particularly hard for Mrs. Lion. Her libido is still asleep so any sexual activity is purely for my benefit. It’s true that she loves giving me orgasms. So, if she were purely selfish, I would be coming very frequently. She knows she has to temper that with the realities of lion taming. Poor lioness.

One of the biggest challenges Mrs. Lion faces is being able to say no to me. If she is generally agreeable to all I want, then she is generally indulging me. That doesn’t mean she should arbitrarily refuse my every request. Our marriage would get into logistical hell if she did that. But if she is aware of the need to train me for obedience she can selectively say no where she would normally say yes. She can also make her “yes” conditional. For example, when I asked if we could go see “The Intern” and she wanted to let me, she could have made it a reward for past behavior, or hold it out until I did something she wanted. So, instead of just saying, “Yes, we can do that.” She could have said, “You have been a good boy and cooked lots of meals. You deserve a treat. We can go” Functionally, it’s the same result. But in my mind, being able to go to the movies was tied to good behavior.

I can’t suggest when a “no” is the best idea. I can only suggest that Mrs. Lion consider the idea that she is training me in obedience and to do that requires her to teach me that I can’t expect to get everything I want; just some of what I want. Maybe we need to discuss requests I make in this light to help us both learn how to use no to the best advantage. Mrs. Lion is loving and kind. I am incredibly lucky that she loves me and wants me to be happy. I am not trying to change that and turn her into a mean and arbitrary woman. I want her to feel entitled to refuse me when she wishes and not worry that she is hurting me.