Last night I unlocked Lion to play with him. We talked about the ruined orgasm experiment a bit. He’s convinced it takes the edge off so he’s not as horny as he normally would be. Despite my best efforts by hand and mouth I could not get Mr. Weenie to wake up. That’s not solely because of the ruined orgasms. Lion said he wanted to get excited, but he thinks he’s too preoccupied about being out of work.

This leads us back to the idea that sometimes life interferes with chastity play and domestic discipline. If Lion feels bad about being out of work, why would I punish him for not taking out the trash? (Just an example because I know our trash needs to be taken out. Not that I will punish Lion for not doing it.) On the other hand, maybe feeling my control would lift his spirits. I know the last thing I’d want if I was already feeling bad is to be reminded that I did something wrong. That would be adding insult to injury. You know, your job ends and you walk outside and not only is it raining, but you have a flat tire and a parking ticket. The world is against you. But in Lion’s universe things are sometimes the opposite of my universe. Bizarro for you Superman buffs. Not that he’d want a flat tire and a parking ticket. But he might feel better if he got something he’s been craving and that might just be punishment.

I may be over simplifying things. I may be way off base. I may not know what the hell I’m talking about. That happens frequently. But I’m wondering if he needs more rules and punishment to keep his spirits up. On the other hand, he really liked his reward coupon the other night. So maybe it’s not just punishment. Maybe it’s attention in general. Control in general. And my reaction to him has been backing off to let him sort things out. My support has just been being there for him, which I know he appreciates. But maybe he needs me to be more there. Not in his face necessarily. Just to let him know I’m still paying attention. I see what he does and doesn’t do.

It may take me a while to figure things out, but eventually I get there. I’ve got my eye on you, my pet. And not just on your cute butt.

1 Comment

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    From recent posts, it seems a punishment dynamic is very important to Lion. Without discounting that, and if it’s a need it’s a need, it’s not the only way to do FLR. We very rarely have punishment, and never have “funishment” — e.g., punished after failing in a no-win situation. But we do have a very strong ruleset, which I think satisfies some of the same needs. I perv on rules. Just being told she’s writing a new one can get me excited for days. Sometimes I suggest rules, especially if I feel I need one to help me reach a goal I’m otherwise struggling with (for example, flossing every night, or curbing my impulse spending).

    I don’t perfectly follow the rules, simply because I’m not perfect. When I fail, we have a discussion. There’s generally a consequence. Sometimes it’s a punishment. Sometimes it’s a change in the rule. Sometimes she decides on grace.

    The general point is it’s her decision every time. She takes into account my needs, wants, and kinks, including the rules-perving. But she decides.

    Again, I know our situations are different, as everyone’s needs are. And Jalan thrives on being dominant in a way you haven’t yet described yourself (that I’ve seen). But in case it helps at all, this is how we do it. The key fact is that the imposition of rules and the response to an infraction come from her.

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