February 2015 (Page 14)

Last night I wasn’t really in the mood for an orgasm. Well, let’s face it, I haven’t been in the mood for a long time and that’s why I’ve scheduled orgasms for myself now too. I considered trading dates with Lion. His is the 5th and mine was the 2nd. Not a big deal since it’s only a few days. However there are a few problems with that arrangement.

At the top of the list is time management. I know in the next few days I should be getting my monthly “visitor”. No possibility for orgasm there unless you are into blood sports, which we are not. So pushing my date off even a few days might have been a problem.

The other, more important reason is that since I’m never really in the mood right now, we made a commitment to my having orgasms on scheduled days. I know things can happen just like they sometimes happen to Lion. If I was sick or feeling rotten then we might have pushed it off. But to push it off because I didn’t feel like doing it would not set a good precedent.

On the other hand, I really wanted to give Lion an orgasm. What luck! I get to decide when he has one. You see, he doesn’t get one just because he wants one, but he does get one just because I want to give him one. Last night he was not concentrating on his own orgasm. He was excited to give me one. He never asked for one. The only thing he was expecting was some form of play.

Afterwards he asked if I was going to change his date. I wondered why I would do that. He still has three days to go before his scheduled date. We didn’t trade dates. We traded orgasms.

(Monday, February 2, 2015) It’s my sixth day of waiting. Over the last year, the sixth day has been particularly difficult for me. Mrs. Lion says I get the “grumblies”. Well, I have them today. In one sense it isn’t surprising. The Seattle Seahawks lost the Superbowl due to what is being called the worst play call in the history of football. It was a heart breaker for Seahawks fans. I am annoyed about that. I also have that sixth day slump as well.

I’m surprised that I do. After all, I had a ruined orgasm just two nights ago. If my theory is correct, which it probably isn’t, I should have the same reaction I feel after a two day wait. I should be content and happy in my enforced chastity. But I’m not. In fact, I feel exactly the same way I have felt after a six day wait with no release of any kind.

This tends to support the common theory that a ruined orgasm does not reset the orgasm clock at all. It spills semen and takes physical pressure off, but does nothing to reduce the need for sex. It does, at least in my case, reduce the physical ability to have an orgasm, but not the need.

I’m still uncaged. My Jail Bird is sitting in Mature Metal’s post office box waiting to get picked up today. It will be delivered to William at MM tomorrow and he can get started on adjusting my base ring. If things go the way they did last time, he should complete his work by Thursday, mail it on Friday, and reach me February 10. The reason I bring this up is that I am perfectly capable of jerking off, but I don’t want to do that. Yet, here I am being grumpy about my enforced chastity. It’s not like I can’t do something about it physically, but something inside me stops me cold.

Am I a broken lion? Have I lost the ability to independently orgasm? Now there’s something to growl about! I don’t think it is as final as all that. I am pretty sure that with the right stimulation I could get myself off. That’s not the point, of course. The point is that my cage isn’t the only thing maintaining Mrs. Lion’s control. I have been conditioned to receive stimulation only from her. Self stimulation is clearly not easy. In the context of enforced chastity, I suppose this is progress.

In terms of my current state of mind, I am feeling down about not having as much sex as I want, when I want. As Mrs. Lion and many of you point out to me, it’s exactly what I want. That doesn’t make it feel better on the sixth day.

Tonight is “tease the lion” night. I do enjoy that in a masochistic way. It’s always fun to feel Mrs. Lion’s hand or mouth on me even though I know I will end up more frustrated than when she began. Such are the conflicts of enforced chastity. At least I have learned to control my growls. I managed to avoid any swats so far today.

My reasoning for giving Lion a ruined orgasm was not to give him relief. It was to make him want an orgasm even more. I would have given him a bonus orgasm by now but he thinks I give him too many orgasms. Well, he really doesn’t think that. He wants more orgasms. But the chastity side of him thinks he gets too many and that he needs to man up and accept fewer. Pffft!

I think it’s a load of crap. That scheduled date is just an arbitrary date on which he is guaranteed to have an orgasm. I decide if he gets any bonuses. He can beg all he wants. Sometimes I laugh at him. Sometimes I give him one. Sometimes I do it because I want to give him one even if he hasn’t begged for one.

Does that mean I’ll never make him wait a long time? I guess it depends on what you define as a long time. A month? Six months? A year? No way! I think 25 days is pushing it. Does that mean I’m not in control? Of course not. When does he get to come? When I say so. How much more in control do I have to be?