Not Guilty

Lion is a horny beast. I am not so much. He feels guilty that he gets all the sex. I feel guilty that I don’t give him enough.

It’s true that my sex drive has been stuck in neutral for a long time. At one point Lion tried every night to turn me on. It caused tension because I was never ready. More recently I said I should have an orgasm at least once a week in an attempt to jumpstart my libido. I let that fall by the wayside too. A few weeks ag I told Lion he could lick me. He said he’d love to do it more often. I told him he could do it whenever he wanted. It was my way to encourage him to initiate again. However, I did not make that clear.

We are still stuck with my not wanting to ask for sex and his not wanting to initiate. Granted, his previous attempts at initiating were met with rejection, so I understand why he is gun shy. I spend so much time planning for his pleasure that I don’t feel I should have to ask for my own. Impasse. We definitely need to communicate better.

I want to stress the fact that I am not horny. Lion has nothing to feel guilty about. It’s not like I am tree-humping horny and he is ignoring me. I know if I even give a hint that I am horny he will be on me in a second. I am only speculating that more attempts at sex would start my engine. There’s no guarantee.

Lion is not guilty.