Lion and I often (read: usually) have different takes on things. When he first suggested a contract some months ago, I said I didn’t think we needed one because we’d just use our common sense. Last week he decided a contract would help me feel less guilty when I’m doing mean things to him. He also wants to know specific times he’ll be teased or played with.
I’m more of a laid back person. I could never have a job in which I had meeting after meeting after meeting. I don’t like the structure. Lion thrives in that environment. I can understand why he would want a schedule of play times. He doesn’t want to be ignored or feel abandoned. But penciling him in for Thursday at 8 pm for a spanking doesn’t really work for me. I like a more spontaneous timing. I’m more likely to not want to play with him at that particular point in time simply because it’s forced.
As for his idea that a contract will make me more secure in the knowledge that he really wants me to hurt him? He could have a contract written in blood, and a tattoo across his butt that says “Spank here” and I wouldn’t feel any differently about going too far and really hurting him. I know he wants me to do these things to him. Otherwise I wouldn’t be doing them.
What if Lion wants to stop doing things? With or without a contract my answer is the same: let’s discuss it and we’ll come to a decision. He told me a long time ago that playing wasn’t important to him. Well that’s obviously not true. So if he wants to stop it’s most likely because he thinks I want to stop. I didn’t do all this work to give up now.
I do agree that we need to revisit things from time to time. That’s where the common sense comes in. Do we need a week off from chastity? Let’s discuss. What if we agreed to a week of ass play but two days in he’s too sore to continue? So we stop. Even if the contract says I can continue, we stop.
Whether we have a contract or not, if I am in charge, we’re using the common sense approach. Lion’s input is still needed. His suggestions and requests are still welcomed. I will decide what to do with it.
I will honor the schedule of teasing him every other day, which was my suggestion, unless it becomes too structured or smothering to me. At which point we’ll discuss it. Again, there’s that common sense.
And, for the record, Lion got another orgasm last night because I felt like giving him one. I know that’s two unscheduled orgasms when he was supposed to have a five day wait. Sue me! I wanted him to come. And what I say goes, contract or no contract.
[She has spoken! We do have very different views of the world. It’s one reason I love her so much. Lion]